


inside, an echo

by tigerlo



Series: I waited (and you came) [1]
Category: Wynonna Earp (TV)
Genre: Angst, Canon Compliant, Character Study, F/F, Fill in Scenes, Fluff, Here is it!, Introspection, Part one of the Waverly POV fic, There's no smut but it's quite racy in a few parts...., canon adjacent, waverly's pov
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-10-31
Updated: 2017-10-31
Packaged: 2019-01-27 09:29:03
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 24,506
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12578704
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/tigerlo/pseuds/tigerlo
Summary: Her hair is bright, like the sun, but even that doesn’t do it justice.orA deeper look into season one from Waverly's POV as she falls in love with Nicole.(part one of a two-part character study)





	inside, an echo

**Author's Note:**

> Goodness gracious, I don't even know where to start with this.
> 
> Firstly, maybe - this thing is huge. I had initially imagined it would be roughly as long as the Nicole piece, maybe a little bit longer, but it's like over twice as long I think. 
> 
> I really didn't want to split it up more than one piece a season, so I've ended up with two stories at about 25,000 words. Now, if this is too overwhelming, let me know and I'll do something different with the season two piece, but I always prefer long stories in one piece so hopefully you'll agree.
> 
> A huge thanks to @lexluthr for reading through this and being a wonderful cheerleader, and @iamthegaysmurf for reading through this and being the most wonderful teacher and an absolute WE encyclopedia, this piece is _so_ much better for your knowledge  <3
> 
> I hope you guys really enjoy this, I kind of love it myself.
> 
> x

  
  


-

  
  


**beginning** .

part one.

  
  


-

  
  


Her hair is bright, like the sun, but even that doesn’t do it justice. 

 

That’s the thing that lingers in Waverly’s mind after Nicole Haught leaves her with a slightly crinkled card and a head swimming with questions. 

 

Nicole Haught, police officer. And professional flirt, by the sounds of it, too. 

 

She’s never been hit on by a woman before. That’s why she’s so flushed and flustered by Nicole’s advances she tells herself later. 

 

That’s why her hands are a little shaky and she feels very hot and she can’t stop staring at the door. 

 

She’s just thrown, because it’s never happened before. 

 

Definitely not because she’d  _ liked _ it. 

 

Because she likes boys.  _ Men _ . Champ; she likes Champ. 

 

She likes muscles and tattoos and testosterone. Doesn’t she? 

 

She’s just thrown, that must be it. Because she saw a Revenant die on the floor of the bar last night and Wynonna is back for good and it’s just a lot of change after years of stasis. After years of mediocre and hamfisted advances from Champ and no change at all. 

 

That must be it. 

 

Waverly’s not blind; she knows Nicole is attractive, but she’s not attracted  _ to _ her. She’s tall and beautiful and suits that hat like she was born with it, and she probably has muscles, too, even if she doesn’t have a tattoo and….

 

Thrown. She’s just thrown. 

 

She’s thrown, but she can’t deny it wasn’t nice, having someone look at her like that even if she’s not interested in anything back. Because Champ likes her body and he shows that physically and in the way he looks at her, but the way Nicole had looked was different. 

 

Like she was seeing  _ more _ . 

 

Maybe that’s why Waverly’s so thrown. Because Nicole had looked at her, properly looked at her and into her and it felt familiar, like they’d maybe met before, which is impossible because Waverly would  _ remember _ meeting someone like Nicole. 

 

She leaves, and Waverly can’t stop looking at the door, and she can’t focus, either, for a good hour because Nicole’s hands had been warm and soft, even for a cop’s, when they’d pulled her wet shirt gently off over her head. 

 

Warm and soft and electric and Waverly swears she felt a shock for the two seconds they’d actually touched skin to skin before Nicole had stepped back, her eyes respectfully high, not like Champ’s would have been, as she’d stepped back and walked out of the bar, her card very present on the wood of the countertop. 

 

It feels heavy, Waverly thinks later that night as she stares at the ceiling, wide awake with Champ snoring loudly next to her. It feels important. Significant. 

 

Which makes absolutely no sense, because her boyfriend is here beside her, so Waverly can’t feel things like that. She shouldn’t. She tries to ignore the fact that it definitely hadn’t felt like that when she’d met Champ for the first time. She was a kid, but still. No spark. No fire-red hair to overwhelm her thoughts. No impossibly gentle hands against her skin. 

 

But Champ is good. He’s fine. He’s  _ here _ . 

 

Waverly tries to ignore the way her mind wanders to Nicole and what she’s doing. If she’s asleep or if she’s up, too. 

 

If she’s thinking about Waverly the way she’s definitely not thinking of Nicole. 

 

She shakes her head though, trying to rid the ghost of a dimple and a striking smile from her mind’s eye as she folds herself into Champ’s chest only to have him grumble in his sleep and pull away, leaving Waverly alone again. 

 

As she moves to the edge of the mattress, pulling the blankets higher around her shoulder, she wonders if Nicole would do the same to a lover in her bed, or whether she'd pull them closer.

 

Somehow, Waverly thinks it’s the second. 

 

It doesn’t occur to Waverly until much later, just before the dawn, that cops don’t normally walk around with a card in their pockets that looks like its been nervously played with for the last day while the holder worked up the courage to actually come into the bar. 

  
  


-

  
  


“God, he’s such a dick,” Waverly says under her breath as she watches her sister leave after her new boss, her feet taking her into their little kitchenette to collect her thoughts before she heads out and home. 

 

Waverly’s pissed because that’s her life’s work in his stupid hands. and she knows its for the greater good that she share it, but his ungratefulness makes her want to snatch the box out of his hands and storm off like a moody teenager. 

 

Her mood’s a little muted, though, because they’d had a visitor in the middle of their debrief. 

 

Nicole. 

 

She’d walked in and seen Waverly and  _ beamed, _ and it had been nice, she supposed, but she’s never really had a look like that sent her way before, so she didn’t know the etiquette and it’s all she could do to smile shyly back. 

 

They’ve seen each other around town a few times since Nicole came into the bar, but it’s still only the second time they’ve properly been in a room together, and Waverly doesn’t quite know what to do with Nicole’s attention beyond the fact that her body feels like it wants to move towards it, automatically and without conscious thought. 

 

Whatever the hell that means. 

 

“I second that,” a voice says gently somewhere behind her and she turns quickly to see Nicole smiling at her, a cup of coffee in her hand. 

 

“I’m sorry,” Waverly says flushing, a little embarrassed as Nicole takes a step towards her. “I didn’t mean to….I mean, I didn’t know anyone else was here.”

 

“It’s ok,” Nicole says with a genuine warmth that Waverly can’t help but smile back to. “I really do second that. He’s a jerk, huh?”

 

_ God, she really is pretty _ , Waverly thinks, forgetting herself, distracted as she leans against the doorframe into the kitchen and just kind of stares for a moment. 

 

“It’s nice to see you again,” Nicole says, taking her place on the other side of the door when Waverly doesn’t say anything. “I’d wondered if you might turn up here with your sister soon.”

 

“Yeah. I, uh... do a bit of research on local history in my spare time, and they wanted to pick my brain,” Waverly says as she tries to collect herself so Nicole doesn’t notice, but the way she’s smiling at Waverly’s obvious blush tells her it’s already too late. 

 

“A bit of a bookworm, huh?” Nicole says with a smile and she’s teasing but there’s no meanness to it. It’s all kindness and  _ soft _ and like she’s maybe a little impressed, too. 

 

“Kind of,” Waverly says. “I mean, I like to read. I didn’t ever want to be like everyone else in this town, you know? Ignorant and uneducated. I like learning.”

 

“There isn’t a college here though, is there?” Nicole ask, curiously frowning. 

 

“Online,” Waverly says with a smile, quietly warm at Nicole’s genuine interest. 

 

“Impressive,” Nicole says, nodding, and Waverly can tell she is and that her eyes shine a little brighter in Waverly’s direction at that, too. “What do you have under your belt then? History?”

 

“History,” Waverly shrugs a little shyly. “Linguistics. The occult. You know, light bedtime reading.”

 

“You’ve got more than one degree?” Nicole says with a raised eyebrow, evidently surprised, and Waverly frowns. 

 

“Why?” She says, steadying herself on the defensive. “You don’t think someone like me could?”

 

“God, no,” Nicole says quickly, shaking her head as she reaches for Waverly’s hands gently. “No, Waverly not at all. I’m just impressed. Most people with that kind of academic prowess are significantly greyer and  _ much _ less attractive. It’s….amazing. And a little intimidating, actually.”

 

“Intimidating?” Waverly says with a smile. “But you’re a  _ cop _ , and they’re just a bit of paper. I didn’t even get a ceremony.”

 

“You’re joking, right?” Nicole says and she smiles that beautiful, completely disarming smile she’d flashed Waverly a few days ago, and Waverly can feel her blush deepen. “That cop stuff is easy. Consider Miss-measly-one degree over here  _ very _ intimidated.”

 

“You’re not making fun of me, are you?” Waverly says with a frown, because she doesn’t think so, but Champ does with a derisive  _ what do you need a degree in Purgatory for,  _ and she’s not really interested in getting it from another angle, too. 

 

“Waverly, I’d never make fun of you,” Nicole says genuinely and seriously and when her hands move over Waverly’s wrists and she realises that they’re still touching. “Ever. I’m sorry if I….”

 

“No,” Waverly says shaking her head as she rushes to apologise. “I’m sorry, Nicole; of course you weren’t. It’s just….a sensitive subject. People seem to be full of the impression that I’m an idiot just because I work in a bar and never left this shitty town, and I don’t know, I just get sick of it sometimes.”

 

“With or without a crazy number degrees, I could  _ never _ think you were an idiot, Wave,” Nicole says and the abbreviation of her name drops from Nicole’s lips easily, more natural than breathing. 

 

Waverly smiles wide, her skin warming more beneath Nicole’s hands, before Nicole’s face turns in a frown and she lets go of Waverly’s hands softly. 

 

“I’m sorry,” Nicole says, running her palm over the back of her neck as she looks to Waverly with a furrowed brow. “I don’t even know if you like your name shortened or if it’s just something you like your friends to call you or….”

 

“We could be friends,” Waverly says with a little shrug because why not, the town’s small and it’s not like there’s a beautiful redhead blowing into town every other week and she could use a new friend. Or a friend, period. “Then, you know, it’d be ok for you to call me Wave if you wanted to?”

 

It’s a genuine offer because there’s something about Nicole that’s intrigued her, but it’s more, too, and although she doesn’t quite know why, the thought of her not becoming a part of Waverly’s world now that she’s met her simply isn’t an option. 

 

She doesn’t think about the fact that in the space of five minutes, Nicole has asked more than Waverly thinks Champ has asked her about her study or anything else the whole time they’ve been dating. She  _ definitely _ doesn’t think about how nice that would be in a partner with soft skin and a softer voice in exchange for the clammy hands and grunted, stunted conversation she has now. 

 

“I’d like that,” Nicole says a little shyly, and Waverly is struck with the thought that she might be a little lonely, but Nicole, new to town with no friends or family here, almost certainly is. “I’d really like that.”

 

“Yeah,” Waverly says gently as she smiles at Nicole, and she doesn’t mean it to, but she thinks it comes out a bit coy. “So would I.”

 

“I’d love to hear about it sometime,” Nicole says smoothly after she shakes herself out of her distraction, her gaze dropping to Waverly’s lips for a second so quick she almost misses it. “Your study, I mean. Maybe I could buy you that coffee you owe me? With two or three days notice, of course.”

 

She’s teasing but there’s no malice in it, not a drop. It’s playful and they’re both smiling and Waverly can feel herself blushing again, and what the heck is going on with her. 

 

“I’d like that, too,” Waverly says as she drops her head in an attempt to hide her face. All it does though is give her an eyeful of hair and she tips her head back to shift it. 

 

She must look stupid, she knows she must, but Nicole just smiles sweetly, amused as her blush deepens before Nicole licks her bottom lip, parting them to speak. 

 

Not that Waverly’s watching them. 

 

“Your hair,” Nicole says, a little distracted as she stares seemingly lost in the sight of Waverly in front of her. “It’s so nice like this. I like it wavy.”

 

“You do?” Waverly mumbles, a little self-conscious, trying unsuccessfully to push it away from her face. “I….it’s not done. I mean, I barely had time to put clothes on when Mr Bossy-Britches called me in. I only just had time to shower, and this is what it looks like when it just dries, and….”

 

She stops herself, biting her tongue to cease the rambling and embarrassing herself any more than she already has. She looks to Nicole to apologise, but she doesn’t seem to mind at all, beaming a little amused back at her. 

 

And then she does something that Waverly’s not expecting, but when she looks back on things much,  _ much _ later, knows was the second spark of the fuse that truly lit the flame.  

 

(The first strike setting the moment their eyes met across low afternoon light and a deep wooden bar)

 

Nicole reaches out to touch a stray lock against Waverly’s cheek, and Waverly’s breath catches hard, she’s not sure why, but it’s enough to snap Nicole out of her trance. 

 

“God, I’m sorry,” Nicole says shaking her head as she pulls away. “I’m sorry, Waverly, what was I thinking. It’s just… it’s nice. It looks really nice.”

 

“It’s ok,” Waverly says quickly, reaching for Nicole’s hands as she drops them to her own side. They’re curled into fists like she’s angry with herself, but they uncurl for Waverly the second she moves for them. “You’re fine. You can, I mean….”

 

_ I mean it’s ok for you to touch me _ , is on the tip of Waverly’s tongue, but she catches it between her teeth just before it lets itself loose, and she has no idea what that means or where it came from, but she knows it is, without a shadow of a doubt, true. 

 

Her thumbs smooth lines on the inside of Nicole’s palms as her hands close around Nicole’s, and she feels the most unusual sensation, like her skin wants to blend with Nicole’s, and she frowns, a little confused because she doesn’t know what  _ that _ means either. 

 

She’s still for a moment, paralysed a little by the peace she can feel moving between them where they meet, before she realises they’re holding hands and she doesn’t even  _ know _ Nicole and she might not want this either.

 

“God, I’m sorry, too,” Waverly says flushing a little embarrassed and she goes to move back, but Nicole’s hands close softly yet swiftly around hers. 

 

“It’s ok,” Nicole says, and she looks as distracted as Waverly feels. “It’s ok. I mean, you never have to say sorry for touching me.”

 

Waverly’s heart skips in her chest,  _ hard _ , and Nicole’s expression makes her even more confused because she doesn’t even know Nicole, and yet this feels like the most extraordinary gift, a simple admission of touch. It’s so simple, but so powerful, and god, she needs some air. 

 

There’s a pregnant pause, and Waverly can’t speak, but she can’t move away either. She can only drop her gaze to their joined hands and marvel at how soft Nicole’s hands are and how well they seem to fit….

 

Nicole breaks the trance this time, maybe conscious of not wanting to make Waverly uncomfortable. She squeezes Waverly’s thumb gently in her palms before she drops or rather eases Waverly’s hands to her sides, and the gentleness in the gesture makes her  _ ache _ . 

 

“You’ve still got my card, right?” Nicole asks, ducking her head to catch Waverly’s attention. 

 

“Yeah,” Waverly says as she shakes her head to try and clear the confusion settling across her chest. “Yeah, I do. I’m sorry I haven’t called to….”

 

She trails off because the card is in her pocket now actually, even if she can’t explain why. Crinkled and worn smooth at the edges with the number of times Waverly’s run her fingers around them. 

 

“It’s ok,” Nicole says with a shrug. “I wasn’t expecting you to, I just wanted you to have it. Just in case, you know?”

 

It’s matter of fact and not a stab at her, but it makes Waverly a little sad regardless, that Nicole knew she wouldn’t call. 

 

“I will this time, though,” Waverly says with a slightly guilty smile. “Hey, I’ll even give you my number if you want. Do you have your phone on you? Or a pen and paper?”

 

“Both,” Nicole says with a smile, and Waverly can’t help but smile back because  _ of course _ she does. “What would you like?”

 

There’s weight behind the last part of that sentence, another  _ universe _ of meaning beneath her words but Nicole doesn’t register them.

 

Or  _ does _ she...

 

Waverly blushes either way, because Nicole is smiling and she’s holding her phone and a pen, palms up to Waverly like she’s offering them and something more, and she doesn’t quite know what to do with that because it’s a small thing, but it’s more than anyone’s ever offered her in her life. 

 

“Phone,” Waverly says with a grin as she reaches to take Nicole’s unlocked mobile. “You won’t lose it that way.”

 

“I’ll have you know I’m  _ very _ responsible,” Nicole says, teasing lightly as she watches Waverly save herself as a contact. “I never lose things once I have them.”

 

There it is again, only this time it’s most definitely not an accident because Nicole’s smiling broadly. 

 

“Two or three days in advance, right?” Nicole says with a wink as she pushes off from the doorway finally. 

 

“I mean, you never know,” Waverly says shrugging innocently. “Call me when you’re free. Or text. I might be able to fit you in a little sooner.”

 

Nicole beams at that, her smile lighting the corners of the room beautifully, and Waverly can’t help but smile back. 

 

“I’ll call you,” Nicole says with an easiness in her voice than Waverly wants to move for. “And hey, ignore Dolls, ok? If he gives you a hard time, let me know. I’m pretty sure I could take him in a fight.”

 

Waverly laughs, the tension swimming between them lifting. 

 

“What? You don’t think so?” Nicole says with an amused raised eyebrow. 

 

“He’s a big guy,” Waverly says with a laugh. 

 

“Don’t underestimate me,” Nicole says, a slightly flirting hint to her words. “I’m not bad, hand to hand. And I’d do anything for a pretty girl.”

 

Waverly’s struck dumb for a second because her flirting so far today has been quite subtle, but that definitely isn’t, like she wants to leave Waverly with no doubt that she’s interested. Nicole just grins at her again before she moves to go. 

 

“See you around, Waverly Earp,” Nicole says bowing with a little smile before she leaves Waverly with a warmth on her cheeks and a head even heavier with questions than before. 

  
  


-

  
  


“ _ Waverly  _ **_Earp_ ** .”

 

Doc’s words echo in her ears like a sharp, broken bell, the thump of his fist on the wood of the bar still pounding in her chest like a war drum.

 

“It sure as hell ain’t gonna be the heir’s pitiful,  _ little _ , sister.”

 

He’s gone, he’s long gone, but Waverly still can’t stop the shake of her hands.

 

“You forgot  _ stupid _ .”

 

But Waverly’s not stupid, she knows she’s not. 

 

She  _ knows _ she’s not. 

 

She’s not stupid, he’s just angry. And an asshole. And a liar.

 

Nicole knows she’s not stupid, too. 

 

He’s angry because Waverly knows who he is, who he’s supposed to be. 

 

Who he’s  _ ashamed _ he’s not. 

 

Waverly knows that she knows who he is, even if he’s denying it with the full strength and timbre of his voice. 

 

She’s back in the bar now after waiting out back until she had heard his boots thud across the floor and out the front door before she had slipped back into the main room and locked the bolt behind him.

 

She walks back towards the bar and pulls her phone out of her pocket in an attempt to busy her hands to stop the tremor, frowning when she sees  _ Missed Call - Xavier Dolls _ , on the screen waiting for her. 

 

_ That’s odd _ , she thinks,  _ I wonder what that’s about.  _

 

If it’s just him demanding another piece of her painstakingly curated research, he can go jump, because she’s had a hell of a day as it is and she doesn’t have the energy to have him swoop in and take everything else she has without so much as a thank you. 

 

It is strange he’s calling her though, because he was supposed to be with Wynonna today. Maybe that’s what it’s about. 

 

She leans against the bar, her hip against the wood as she dials her voicemail and waits for it to connect through. It’s not Dolls’s voice that greets her when it does though, it’s Nicole’s. 

 

She smiles without meaning to at the thought of Nicole’s voice on the other end somewhere in town, and then she frowns. Because if Nicole is calling her from Dolls’s phone, that means they’re together and if they’re together, then….

 

It’s not a social call. Not at all. And her blood runs cold at the sound of Nicole’s voice, unfamiliarly serious. 

 

“Hey, Waverly it’s me. Nicole. Haught, I mean. Nicole Haught. I’m really sorry that this is the way I have to leave my first message for you but I’ve kinda got some news. There’s been an incident at Crown Surplus store, and your sister’s here helping, but there’s been a bit of a development and they’ve taken her to another location. They’ve got Champ, too, and Shorty, but they look fine. I mean the boys aren’t who they’re focused on. Look, I know this is scary, but I’m going to do everything I can. We are, I mean. Nedley and me. Deputy Marshal Dolls is here, too, and we’re all here for her, Wave, so try not to worry. I’ll call you if there’s any update, ok. And call me if there’s anything you need. Anything.”

 

She slides down the side of the bar, her shirt and bare skin catching roughly on the handle as she drops to the floor. 

 

It’s shock more than anything, she thinks. Shock, because for the first time in fifteen years, someone has taken something precious. And for the first time in fifteen years, she’s scared for it. 

 

Because she’s lived with loss her entire life, but hasn’t  _ lost _ anything in a very, very long time. 

 

She’s terrified because, god, it’s Wynonna. Her Wynonna, and yet somehow it’s ok because Wynonna’s in trouble, but Nicole’s there somewhere, trying to help, and that gives Waverly more comfort than she thought it could. 

 

She knows there’s nothing she can do. She’s small and untrained and uselessly human, so she curls her feet beneath her body on the floor. 

 

And waits. 

  
  


-

  
  


The call comes just before nightfall. 

 

Wynonna is fine, but Shorty is dead. 

 

This man that was almost her father, who gave her a job and a place to live and looked out for her when so few others would, gone. 

 

Wynonna doesn’t give her details, she just tells her to organise something at the bar for him. A wake to honour his death, and Wynonna is hard, but she sounds  _ broken, _ so Waverly says yes without thinking.  _ Of course, Wynonna. Anything.  _ Because she understands, because it feels like a piece of her has cracked, too. 

 

She calls around and Gus helps organise the bar and people start arriving to drink to the man that has served them all more times than any of them can count. 

 

Champ turns up eventually, the surviving hero, and Waverly’s glad he’s ok, really she is, but it’s hard not to roll her eyes when he tells his version of events because Wynonna has told her what really happened, and there’s a difference between recounts, and Champ’s sets himself predictably in a much brighter light. 

 

She shrugs him off when he puts his arm around her shoulders as though she’s some sort of prize or attachment like he always does when he’s drinking because she can’t deal with it tonight, and when she’s had about enough and starts to think about slipping off and away back to the homestead, Nicole walks through the door. 

 

Her eyes find Waverly’s before they find anything else or anyone else and they soften in grief and sorrow in a way that Champ’s have yet to. 

 

She walks straight for Waverly and her voice breaks a little when she tells Waverly how sorry she is, and her hands pause for a fraction of a second before they throw caution to the hounds and she reaches across the bar for Waverly’s. 

 

Her palms close soft over Waverly’s wrists before they move down to wrap around her curled fingers and Waverly has to stop the sigh that floats up from the bottom of her lungs because it’s such a small touch, so insignificant in the grand scheme of the universe, but it’s not as well. 

 

Her touch is warm and comforting and reassuring and gentle and safe, and Waverly’s throat is thick with grief, but she feels the grip around her neck loosen significantly under the prompt of Nicole’s hands. 

 

She opens her mouth to say something and Waverly opens hers, too, but then Champ slides in beside her, as though he’s got a damn sixth sense for someone superior talking to his girl. He drops his arm over Waverly’s shoulders possessively, and Waverly has to stop herself from physically recoiling. 

 

Nicole backs off immediately, taking her hands from Waverly’s as though she’s been burned, but Waverly reaches forward after her, automatically and without thought, because her body prioritises Nicole’s touch over the oppressive one at her side. 

 

She nods politely when Waverly thanks her and tries not to grimace when Champ echoes her words and Waverly watches with a heavy heart as Nicole walks up towards the door. 

 

She does shrug Champ off then, patience drained as she turns to busy herself with glasses until she can see an opportunity to slip away. She knows she shouldn’t, but her eyes move around the room as soon as Champ is gone, searching for Nicole, hoping beyond reason that she hasn’t gone yet. 

 

That Waverly might catch one more glance. 

 

She hasn’t gone though, in fact she’s set up right in Waverly’s line of sight, as though she knew Waverly would be looking for her. That Waverly might  _ need _ her. 

 

Out of reach slightly, but  **there** . 

 

She takes a position against a post and sets her body like she’s there to stay for a while, and Waverly breathes easier knowing Nicole is there even if she can’t go as far as to actually make for her. 

 

She doesn’t leave until she watches Waverly slip out the back door, throwing her a quick wink before she turns to the door finally and leaves, too. 

 

Waverly doesn’t realise until she slides into the driver's seat that in spite of everything, she’s still smiling. 

  
  


-

  
  


She’s confused. 

 

She knows it’s the cliche of the century, but Waverly is confused. 

 

Because her whole life, the only option has only ever been boys. 

 

Boys like Champ Hardy and his kind, with their grabby hands and hot eager breath. 

 

That’s it. The sum total of her options. 

 

But Nicole has swept into her life in a blaze of red and soft and life, with the possibility of a future Waverly has never once considered. 

 

Because you don’t know what you don’t know, right? And Waverly knows about  _ that _ . That there are boys that like boys and girls that like girls, like Nicole, but she’s never once thought about where she fits on that spectrum. 

 

She’s never thought about it because it’s never come up. Because she’d defaulted to boys and just thought what she had with Champ was it, that was the height of what people felt for one another, because that’s all she’s ever seen from other people in town. 

 

She’s never beheld a great romance or true love or anything like that beyond what she’s seen on the tv, and always thought fairy tales were just that. An over exaggeration of real love. 

 

But in comes Nicole, and she’s attentive and gentle and thoughtful and treats Waverly like she’s special, and they’re not even  _ dating _ . 

 

She wonders how different it would be if they were. 

 

She turns Waverly’s head. That’s what convinces Waverly something is different in the end. Because flattery is flattery and Nicole has that in spades, but Waverly should be able to take that at face value and set aside what it does to her. Or, she should if she was strictly straight. 

 

But she can’t. 

 

And Nicole turns her head every damn time she sees her. 

 

Waverly’s not stupid; she thinks she knows what that means, but that’s….

 

That’s huge and that’s scary and,  _ god _ , that’s a hell of a change. One of the biggest, in fact. 

 

It’s scary because coming to terms with something like that, in a town like this where everyone has known Waverly her entire life, is a big deal. A really big deal. Because she’s had enough whispers follow her without adding  _ gay  _ to them, too. 

 

It’s different for Nicole because she’s an import; people don’t know her as anything other than  _ her, _ but people will talk about Waverly. And honestly, she’s had enough of that already to last a lifetime. 

 

It’s much easier to ignore it, whatever these feelings for Nicole are. To keep pretending. 

 

Only that isn’t fair. It’s not fair that everyone else gets to be who they are, every brand and level of crazy, while she doesn’t. It’s not fair to her, and it’s not fair to Nicole either, because for some reason she feels fate-bound to give her a chance. 

 

It would be simpler to stay, though. To take the safe road and keep Champ in her bed, because life here is hard enough and she doesn’t want to make it harder for herself. 

 

And it wouldn’t be  _ great _ with him, but it would be ok. It would be average, and that’s all everyone else seems to have. It’s  _ fine, _ and that might be hard in itself, but being with him, it’s a certainty and that’s a rare thing to come by in this town. 

 

The problem is it’s not as simple as that because the rational part of her is there, but the one full of hope and l i g h t is there, too, and it speaks to her in the small hours of the morning. 

 

It says: It won’t be easy, sure. But what if it’s  _ worth _ it. 

 

Because Nicole is very clearly interested in her, and she has shown Waverly a glimmer of what it might be like to have a partner. To have someone to share everything with. 

 

Because Waverly has spent a handful of moments with Nicole, but they feel more significant than the almost decade she’s spent following Champ. 

 

It’s too much to make a decision on just yet, because Waverly Earp is a thinker and a planner and she makes pro and con lists, but she already thinks even without them that she knows which way this wind is going to blow.  

  
  


-

  
  


She’s not sure when they set, her feelings for Nicole, only that she wakes one morning and they’re there as solid and true as if they were another real part of her body. 

 

Because she’s felt something since she walked into the bar, but they hadn’t solidified yet. 

 

Once they have, though, it’s so hopeless to think of anything but a future with her in it and Waverly by her side, and Waverly’s dreams begin to fill with the spectre of Nicole. 

 

The morning it happens for the first time, she turns in bed, half-asleep still, and she’s expecting to reach out and find smooth skin and slightly messy red hair, only when her hand meets body warmth, it’s too hot and too male and  _ definitely _ not Nicole. 

 

She jolts up, scared for a moment at who the hell is in her bed before she remembers that Nicole isn’t the one who is supposed to be there. Champ is. 

 

He grumbles in his sleep, and the disappointment hits Waverly so deeply in her belly that she wants to cry, and it’s stupid because they’re not even together, and Waverly isn’t even attracted to women. It had been a dream, but it’d been real enough and tangible enough that it may as well have been a premonition. 

She rolls out of bed because she can’t sleep, will not allow sleep lest Nicole come back to her, because she won’t have that. She won’t have them both in her bed. Nicole deserves  _ so _ much better than that. 

 

It’s not quite dawn but Waverly needs to be awake, and not in bed with him, so she creeps out of Champ’s messy, clothes-strewn, cologne-heavy bedroom, snatching up the clothes she can see off the floor on her way out. 

 

She’s still wearing most of what she arrived in, thank goodness, because she had pushed off Champ’s advances with a stoic  _ not tonight, Champ--someone died for god sake _ , so there isn’t much she needs to throw on before she can slip out the front door, a loose sweater pulled on over her camisole and a pair of her old slacks fine to see her home in.

 

It’s still before dawn though, and even if she were ready to face the company of another, she doesn’t want to wake Wynonna before she’s ready, not after the day she had yesterday.

 

Waverly pulls out onto the road, turning the car towards Shorty’s with the key to the bar nestled in the bottom of her handbag, where she resolves to spend the next few hours in the peace of her own company before she drives out to the homestead, and  _ home, _ to Wynonna. 

 

It’s not dark enough that she needs to turn her headlights on, but the low glow of the horizon only just shows her reflection in the mirror, her loose ponytail dropping long tendrils of hair down around her face like a sleep-drunk queen. 

 

It doesn’t take her long to get to Shorty’s, but the mist of the cold morning air rising off the hood of her Jeep makes her pause when she arrives, so she reaches over and bundles the blanket in the backseat up in her arms, throwing it over her shoulders before she jumps out of the vehicle and hurries inside. 

 

Waverly makes herself a quick cup of coffee in the bar kitchen before she walks back outside to soak in the sharp, fresh morning air, the heavy woolen blanket still draped around her like royal garb.

 

The weather remains warm here, but the mornings are always cold, and she shivers before she takes a sip of the hot coffee in her hands. 

 

It’s almost dawn now, the sky lightening as the sun rises, and it’ll be beautiful in a moment, but for some reason, Waverly wants to hold it like this because the world is peaceful in the silence. 

 

She leans back against the wall of the bar, closes her eyes, takes a deep breath and  _ stills _ , and it’s lovely for a moment before she hears footfalls coming her way. 

 

Waverly doesn’t know  _ how _ she does, but she knows they’re not an enemy’s footfalls before she opens them again. Something about their cadence is steady. 

 

Soft. 

 

And when she opens her eyes, she’s not really surprised to see Nicole. Not really. 

 

Waverly doesn’t believe in fate, she has seen too much go pear-shaped in her life to believe any half-reasonable being or force would cause this much grief to people, but if she did, good  _ Lord _ , this is it. 

 

Here, now, with Nicole in front of her, she can’t help but feel like this is a perfect demonstration of it. 

 

She’s out of breath and her cheeks are flushed and her hair is pulled back in a braid and she’s wearing running tights that cling to her more than her khakis do, and for a moment, Waverly can only stare and try to take her all in. 

 

“Good morning,” Nicole says as she comes to a stop in front of Waverly. Her hands are on her hips and her breath is uneven, but when she looks to Waverly, she  _ beams _ . “Fancy seein’ you here.” 

 

She blushes at Nicole’s words this morning because it feels a little different now, having woken up with the dream of Nicole on her fingertips. Not that Nicole knows that of course, but still. 

 

“Good morning to you, too,” Waverly says a little shyly, because she’s still wearing the clothes she’d grabbed from the floor at Champ’s, and while they’re not exactly  _ inappropriate _ , they’re definitely not what Waverly would be caught wearing outside of the house. Or what she’d like Nicole to see her in.

 

It doesn’t matter though, because Nicole’s eyes drop a little lower and she takes in the sight of Waverly before her, and from the warmth of her gaze, Waverly could be wearing a ballgown. 

 

Or nothing at all. 

 

“You’re really dedicated to your work, huh,” Nicole says teasing as her eyes flick back to the bar. “Here before the crack of dawn?”

 

“I just arrived,” Waverly says with a quiet smile. “Couldn’t sleep.”

 

“Are you ok?” Nicole asks, concerned, her brow crinkling in a frown. “I mean….after…. How’s your sister? Is she ok?”

 

“I don’t know,” Waverly says shyly, and she almost doesn’t want to because she’s embarrassed to admit it. Because for some reason, she feels like she should be, but she doesn’t want to give Nicole anything but the truth. “I haven’t actually been home, yet. I mean, I live out on the homestead with Wynonna now, but I was in town last night after…. and Wynonna looked like she wanted to be alone, so I stayed with…..”

 

“Oh,” Nicole says and her face falls and the disappointment in her voice makes Waverly’s stomach drop, but Nicole is good, damn she’s good, and her poker face is back in an instant. “I’m glad you had company, Waverly. I would have hated for you to be alone.”

 

_ But I would much rather it had been me _ , hangs between them in the pre-dawn light. 

 

“Thank you again,” Waverly says quickly, keen to draw the topic away from Champ. “For yesterday. For everything you did. For calling, and….”

 

“Just doing my job,” Nicole says gently as she lowers her head modestly. 

 

“I know,” Waverly says and her heart hurts at the thought that that’s all it was, but she looks to Nicole in the next second and knows it wasn’t. “But you didn’t have to, and it meant a lot. And it wouldn’t have happened, I mean I wouldn’t have known what was going on without you.”

 

“I just….” Nicole starts, but she trails off and her eyes wander a little like the fatigue from her run has made her a little bolder with her gaze. She catches herself though, just as Waverly is about to get lost in exactly the same thing. “I didn’t want you to find out from anyone else. I wanted it to come from someone who wasn’t just giving you a gossipy account, you know?” 

 

“It meant a lot,” Waverly says softly, and she smiles with the light of the slowly rising sun and Nicole _glows_ _back_ like a matching star. “It means a lot.”

 

“Anytime, Waverly,” Nicole says sweetly. “Hey, I’d better get going if I want to make it to work in time, or Nedley will have me doin’ nights for a month. Maybe I could buy you that coffee sometime this week, huh? With sufficient notice, obviously. If you wanted someone to keep you company at all.”

 

And it’s a strange thing, but Waverly almost feels like Nicole can tell something is different, like her body knows Waverly’s mind is on the precipice of change. 

 

“I’d like that,” Waverly says as she leans back against the wall of the bar, and she doesn’t miss how Nicole takes a step towards her like Waverly’s body has drawn it with her own. “I’d really like that, Nicole.”

 

“Yeah,” Nicole says and she’s smiling a beautiful wide smile now that’s surpassing the half-full light of the sky. “Me, too.”

 

There’s a pause for a second and the height of the sun and the way it flares behind Nicole draws a memory from the depths of Waverly’s blood that doesn’t feel like it’s actually happened yet, and she can’t see it clearly, but for some strange reason she knows it will. 

 

There’s a ghost of an echo that sounds like _ I betrayed her, because I love you, _ but that doesn’t make any sense, none at all. 

 

Waverly shakes her head to clear the dream and her eyes settle to find Nicole watching her patiently, like she could so all day as easily as breathing. 

 

“Where’d you go?” Nicole asks as she tilts her head, and there’s such a genuine warmth in her voice, like she cares. Like she’s actually interested. And it makes Waverly’s body turn towards Nicole’s a little more. “Just now, you kind of left your eyes. Is everything ok?”

 

“Yeah,” Waverly says easily as she softens, because here, with Nicole, it is. “I don’t know how to describe it, it was like I had déjà-vu, but it was different.”

 

“What about?” Nicole asks gently. “The bar?” 

 

“No,” Waverly says with a small, shy smile. “You.”

 

“Oh,” Nicole says, and she sounds surprised, genuinely surprised that Waverly had been thinking of her, and Waverly wants to say  _ if only you knew how much I did think about you,  _ but she thinks Nicole might hear that from the arch of Waverly’s body anyway. 

 

It’s strange, but Waverly feels like half of their communication isn’t verbal, it’s physical and invisible and it happens in the shape their bodies make when they’re around each other, and Waverly is struck by how special that is, when they haven’t even shifted away from  _ just friends _ yet. 

 

Or maybe they have and she’s kidding herself that they haven’t, because this feels like more than just friends. This feels like something truly deep. 

 

“Sorry,” Waverly says. because she wants to test something. “I’m sorry if that’s strange, or a little weird, or….”

 

“No,” Nicole says quickly as she shakes her head. “Not weird at all, Wave. It’s nice. To know you think about me.”

 

She bites her lip like she hadn’t been intending to release that last bit of information, and Waverly can’t help but smile because that’s what she was looking for, a reaction like that. 

 

“I mean, I didn’t say it was a  _ good _ déjà-vu,” Waverly shrugs, teasing a little and Nicole frowns and smiles simultaneously. 

 

“You’re trouble, Waverly Earp,” Nicole says with a smirk, and Waverly drops her head shyly. “You know that, right?”

 

Her hair is still half-tied up in a messy bun atop her head, but the movement draws a few more strands loose and they fall around her eyes when she lifts her gaze to meet Nicole’s one last time. 

 

Nicole’s watching her with a sort of abject curiosity and affection, and she moves forward without thinking to tuck a strand of hair behind Waverly’s ear. 

 

She catches herself mid-movement and she opens her mouth to apologise, her hand still by Waverly’s face, but Waverly smiles and blushes in a way that says  _ don’t apologise, please,  _ so she doesn’t. She just makes the movement longer, her hand pausing against Waverly’s cheek, her thumb just glancing across Waverly’s jaw before she drops her hand finally. 

 

The place where Nicole’s skin has met hers  _ burns _ , in the most extraordinary way, and Waverly bites her lip and can feel her face redden and Nicole’s smile grows wider, impossibly, and Waverly understands then that Nicole’s touch was a test of her own. 

 

“You really need to get to work,” Waverly says even though she  _ really _ doesn’t want her to leave, and she definitely doesn’t want to have to answer the call from Champ in a few minutes, asking where the heck she is.

 

“I really do,” Nicole says without moving a muscle, like she’s just as locked into place here with Waverly as she feels herself. 

 

There’s a pause, and Nicole’s eyes drop to Waverly’s lips before she shakes her head softly, collecting herself. 

 

“I really do,” Nicole says a little clearer, but the hesitation and reluctance in her voice is as loud as a bell. “You’ll be ok?”

 

Again, with the concern. With the tiny show of affection that Champ has never, not once, shown her. 

 

“Yeah,” Waverly says. “I’m up now, I might just head straight out to the homestead. I don’t actually  _ have _ work.”

 

Out to the homestead and away from him. 

 

“I’m sure your sister will like the company,” Nicole says, and she smiles a little brighter at the hidden layer in Waverly’s words. 

 

“Only if I come with coffee,” Waverly says, rolling her eyes, and she wants to do something with her hands, to touch Nicole’s arm in thanks or hug her or  _ something, _ but she’s still holding her damn cup. 

 

Nicole reads the conflict on her face easily, though, and she does something that honest to god stops Waverly’s heart for a second. And Waverly knows she only does it then because no one will see and they feel like the only souls awake for miles, just in case it’s something Waverly is worried about another person spotting, but it’s no less significant for it. 

 

She leans in and presses a kiss to Waverly’s cheek, her hand soft and warm on the bend of Waverly’s arm holding her coffee, and Waverly  _ sighs _ . 

 

Because Nicole’s cheek is warm from her run, but it’s nice and she smells like fresh linen and cold and the vague scent of her perfume and mint where she must have brushed her teeth before she left home. 

 

Home. 

 

She wonders what that looks like. What Nicole’s presence looks like in a home. 

 

Her lips press ever so softly, and for a second Waverly is overwhelmed with just how easy it would be to turn her head and marry their lips together….

 

And then Nicole is gone, clearly conscious of boundaries and space, but her hand is still gentle on Waverly’s elbow and she releases the shaky breath she didn’t know she had been holding, and Nicole shines. 

 

“This has been nice,” Nicole says with a warmth that shows in her eyes. “I could get used to starting my days like this.”

 

“Yeah,” Waverly says with a smile, because Nicole’s right. “Me, too. Maybe you should bump into me here again sometime. Or you could run out to the homestead, if that’s not too far. I could make you breakfast? Drop you back into town?” 

 

“Well that almost sounds too good to be true,” Nicole says with a smirk. “Count me in.”

 

There’s another pause, and Nicole just watches Waverly with a grin before Waverly’s face breaks into a smile. 

 

“Now, go,” Waverly says with a laugh, gesturing down the road. “I don’t want to make you later than I already have.”

 

“It would be worth it,” Nicole says with a shrug, sliding in one last blow to Waverly’s crumbling self-restraint. “I’ll see you around, Waverly Earp.”

 

“Hey, Nicole,” Waverly says when Nicole’s a few steps away from her. “I might take you up on that coffee soon, too, if that’s still ok? I think maybe….I might be in the market for some proper company one day soon, if you can spare it?”

 

And she doesn’t want to say  _ because I’m thinking about breaking up with Champ,  _ because Waverly’s not that girl. She won’t string Nicole along, but she wants Nicole to know where her head’s at. 

 

“Of course,” Nicole says, and the grin that splits her face says to Waverly that she understands the implication in her words. “You’ve got my number. Any time, ok? If you want someone to come have a coffee with you at the crack of dawn or in the middle of the night, I’m your girl ok?”

 

I’m your girl. 

 

_ Your _ girl. 

 

“Got it,” Waverly says with another smile that she feels in her bones as she pushes at Nicole gently with the hand not holding her cup. “Now, go.”

 

Nicole ducks her head to hide her smile before she jogs away, turning back a few times to catch Waverly still watching. 

 

Waverly  _ definitely _ doesn’t wait until she’s completely out of sight and she  _ definitely _ doesn’t watch the way Nicole’s muscles move as she does. 

 

So she definitely doesn’t need to sigh heavily before she turns with a slightly weighed down but more resigned heart, inside. 

  
  


-

  
  


“We’re  _ done _ , Champ.”

 

Her voice is strong, and she’s been unsure for so long, but even if Nicole doesn’t want her (and she's fairly certain she does), Waverly knows she can’t do this thing with Champ for a second longer. 

 

“We’re done.”

 

She’s been heavy with fear and uncertainty for days because she knows what she feels about Nicole now, but it’s  _ huge _ , it’s so huge and she’s still so scared because she has to do this alone for now, but she listens to Champ’s voice and something in her breaks, and in an instant, everything makes sense. 

 

She can’t do this anymore, the pretence. They’re done. 

 

Because she’s scared, but this thing with Nicole, the potential and the hope?

 

She wants it  _ more _ than her fear. 

  
  


-

  
  


Waverly has never been particularly in touch with her sexuality; not physically anyway. 

 

She’s never actually touched herself, not really, but that night she  _ does, _ and for the first time in her life, she comes with Nicole’s name between her thighs. 

 

She’s tried once or twice before with Champ on her mind, but it had never really  _ worked _ . Now she knows why, at least. 

 

Because the thought of the combination of his hands and his lips had done nothing for her, but Nicole’s? That’s a different story  _ entirely _ . 

 

She slides her hand between her thighs, closes her eyes and arches her back into the dark, and imagines Nicole’s breath warm at her neck. 

 

She holds the memory of Nicole’s hands on her wrist and imagines them at her breasts instead, travelling lower and lower down her belly until they find smooth skin and a wet,  _ wet _ heat.  

 

She breathes her name into the night,  _ Nicole,  _ and it resonates so deeply against her skin that she wonders if Nicole hears it, too. 

  
  


-

  
  


_ She’s as beautiful as a statue _ , Waverly remarks as she leans against the door into the kitchen, watching Nicole, oblivious to her presence, make herself a hot drink. 

 

She watches the back of Nicole as she draws the spoon she’s just used to stir milk and sugar through her coffee into her mouth to suck off the lonely drips of liquid, and Waverly flushes as the action prompts a memory of last night, her mind moving to the way she’d palmed her own breast as she’d worked her hand quicker and quicker with Nicole’s name between her teeth and….

 

“Oh, hey,” Nicole says brightly, her smile filling the small room when she turns to find Waverly waiting at the door. “I didn’t think we’d see you here today.”

 

“It’s just a quick visit,” Waverly says with a shy shrug, and she feels like Nicole knows, like she can tell what Waverly used her ghost for last night, but she couldn’t possibly, so she bites her lip and carries on. “Wynonna needed something.”

 

“Lucky me then, huh?” Nicole says as she turns to top her drink up with a tiny bit of boiling water. She can’t drag her eyes away from Waverly though, and in her half-distracted state, drops a big splash on the top of her hand when she tips the kettle. “Ah, shit.”

 

“Oh, jeez,” Waverly says, rushing over to her immediately. “That’s totally my fault, I’m sorry. Here let me help you.”

 

“How is this your fault?” Nicole asks with a smile as Waverly takes her hand gently and runs the tap cold for a few seconds before she holds Nicole’s hand under, the water running over her skin, too. 

 

“I distracted you,” Waverly says apologetically as she watches the skin on Nicole’s hand redden, even under the cold tap. “God, I’m sorry, Nicole, this might blister.”

 

“It’s not your fault I couldn’t take my eyes off you,” Nicole laughs, and it’s casual enough, but Waverly feels a little jolt settle in her belly and fire, regardless. “Entirely my fault, Wave. Ow, it is a bit sore, though.”

 

It’s a small thing, sure, but Nicole closing off the implication that this is in anyway her fault means something to her, because people have laid blame at her feet her entire life, and to have finally found someone who sets her free of it is  _ extraordinary _ . 

 

“Here,” Waverly says, running her fingers whisper soft over the heated skin of Nicole’s hand, light enough that it doesn’t hurt, but so that the touch is reassuring, or is meant to be, anyway. “Just a little longer under the water and then we can put some ointment on it.”

 

“Thank god you’re here,” Nicole says as she looks down to Waverly with a smile, and Waverly notices how close they’re standing, hip to hip and shoulder to shoulder. 

 

Nicole’s breath is soft on her face, vaguely sweet like icing or candy, and Waverly wants to move closer, to taste instead of feel….

 

Nicole’s hands jump under hers a little and the movement snaps her out of her reverie, and she comes back to her body to the image of Nicole staring a little dreamily back at her, too. 

 

“If I wasn’t here, you wouldn’t have burned your hand in the first place,” Waverly replies wryly as she drops her head and focuses on the feeling of Nicole’s hands in her own under the cool water. 

 

“It’s a small price to pay,” Nicole grins, and Waverly knows that says she knows exactly what she’s saying and that it’s very,  _ very _ intentional. “And again, it’s not your fault. I’m clumsy all by myself.”

 

“You are not,” Waverly says with a frown as she checks the temperature of the skin around the burn before shutting the tap off. “You’re a cop. Cops aren’t clumsy.  _ You _ aren’t clumsy.”

 

“I am  _ so _ clumsy,” Nicole laughs, and it’s nice, to hear it trip free from Nicole’s lips, almost a song to Waverly’s ears. 

 

“I’ve never seen you do anything even remotely clumsy,” Waverly says as she grabs a clean towel from one of the drawers with her spare hand, the other cemented to Nicole’s injured one. 

 

“That’s because I try really,  _ really _ hard not to be when you’re around,” Nicole replies with a smile and a blush, and Waverly knows at once that she’s telling the truth. 

 

“You do not,” Waverly says for the sake of it, but mostly because she wants to hear Nicole affirm it herself. 

 

“I do so,” Nicole says, nodding with a wide grin, and it’s Waverly’s turn to blush then. “I’m glad to hear it’s working, though, that’s a bonus at least.”

 

“It’s definitely working,” Waverly confirms as she takes them over to the small table with Nicole’s hand wrapped carefully in her own and the first aid kit under her arm. 

 

Nicole moves smoothly with Waverly, falling so naturally into step with her that it feels like they move as one body. 

 

She seems quite happy to be led over and down into a chair, smiling as she watches Waverly unpack the first aid kit. 

 

Waverly catches her gaze when she looks up every few seconds, still holding Nicole’s hand with the other that’s not searching through the kit for the burn cream and desperately trying to control her blush. 

 

“You  _ can _ let go of my hand if that’s gonna’ make things easier,” Nicole says with a cocked head and a grin. 

 

“Oh,” Waverly says shyly as she drops Nicole’s hand gently, not missing the way Nicole’s face falls just a fraction when she does. “It’s an old habit, sorry. Gus always used to do it when I’d hurt myself when I was little.”

 

She feels embarrassed and a bit silly at being caught out, but it isn’t necessary, not in the slightest because the expression on Nicole’s face isn’t anything but a little touched, her bottom lip caught between her teeth as she listens intently. 

 

“That’s really sweet,” Nicole says when it’s obvious Waverly’s done talking, and Waverly knows she  _ means _ it. 

 

Nicole scoots under the table a little more to bring them closer together and her knees knock against Waverly’s softly under the table as she holds her hands towards Waverly like an offering. 

 

“I mean if those are the  _ rules _ ,” Nicole teases with a mock serious expression on her face. “Then who are we to ignore them, huh?”

 

Waverly smiles as she takes Nicole’s hands again, the cream ready on the table, and it’s a small gesture, but it feels  **massive** . It feels significant because there are butterflies in the blood of her wrists and her stomach feels like there’s a drum in it and all they’re doing is holding hands. 

 

“Who are we, indeed,” Waverly replies with a shy grin, and it’s innocent enough, but there’s another layer if Nicole cares to look for it, which she does if the curious expression on her face is anything to go by. 

 

“Thank you,” Nicole says with a soft smile, and Waverly, in that instant, can  _ see _ . She can  _ see _ what a future with Nicole would look like, soft glances and softer hands and affirmation and hope and heat, too. 

 

“What?” Waverly asks a little confused, distracted by her runaway thoughts. 

 

“I haven’t said thank you for looking after me,” Nicole says, gesturing to her hand in Waverly’s own. “After this, my silly burn. Thank you, Waverly.”

 

“Nothing about you is silly,” Waverly returns easily and Nicole beams. “And you’re welcome. Although I do feel terrible, and….”

 

“Wave,” Nicole says, turning her hand in Waverly’s own so she can squeeze them gently and stop her head running. 

 

“Sorry,” Waverly replies a little shyly, but Nicole only smiles brighter at her. 

 

“You have absolutely nothing to be sorry for,” Nicole says sweetly. “Except for maybe fixin’ me up too quick so I have to get back to work, because your company is a big improvement on Nedley, I’ll tell ya.”

 

“I should hope so,” Waverly scowls teasingly as she applies a bit of cream to the burn, slower now at Nicole’s admission. 

 

“Oh hey, that reminds me,” Nicole says with a grin. “I have something for you.”

 

“What is it?” Waverly asks interestedly. “You don’t need to be buying me anything, Nicole Haught.”

 

“I know,” Nicole says with a shy smile. “But I’m allowed to, right?”

 

“Of course you are,” Waverly returns warmly. “No one else does, it’d make for a nice treat.”

 

“Damn,” Nicole says, frowning as she fishes around in her pocket with her uninjured hand for something. “This isn’t exactly a treat, but I can work on that for next time.”

 

The  _ next time _ makes her heart skip a beat, because  **next time** , Nicole wants there to be a next time. 

 

“Got it,” Nicole exclaims, biting her lip as she puts a tiny spray bottle on the table-top, a blush covering her cheeks. 

 

“Is that?” Waverly starts before she breaks off with a smile. 

 

“Mace?” Nicole says with a frown. “Yeah, it kinda is. Told you it wasn’t overly romantic. Oh, not that that’s how I meant it, I just wanted to….”

 

“You brought me a can of mace?” Waverly asks with a smile and, honestly, she’s beyond touched.  _ Beyond _ . 

 

“It seems so stupid now, but you said that Dolls gave you a hard time the other day?” Nicole says a little shyly. “And I know that guy, Henry is it? Has been spending a lot of time with you guys, and I just….I dunno you’re small, Wave, and I know you’re strong, but I wanted you to have a little something. Just in case? I’m sorry, it really is dumb, huh?”

 

“Oh,” Waverly says, ducking her head a little embarrassed. “Yeah, he did, but he apologised. He’s ok, I think. And a little in love with my sister. Actually, I think they both are.”

 

“You don’t have to take it,” Nicole says as her cheeks redden. “I just….got it in case he or Dolls ever give you any more trouble.”

 

“I love it,” Waverly replies softly as she squeezes Nicole’s hand. “I love it, Nicole. No one's ever done anything even half as thoughtful.”

 

“You do?” Nicole asks, smiling with the sweetest relief. 

 

“Yeah,” Waverly says gently as she nods. “I really do.” 

 

She’s struck then with the overwhelming urge to reach across the table and kiss Nicole senseless, but she knows now isn’t the time or the place because she doesn’t want to do this when Wynonna could storm in and ruin it before it even begins. 

 

Because when she does that, when she kisses Nicole (and she knows now that she wants that,  _ god _ she does) she wants to have time. She wants to know she’s not going to be interrupted. She wants to know Nicole isn’t going to softly stop her for fear of someone walking in. 

 

“It’s really, really nice, Nicole,” Waverly says gently, and she tries to stop the tears, but they creep unbidden anyway because it’s just so, so sweet. 

 

Sweeter than she’s used to. Sweeter than she could have imagined, truth be told. The kind of gesture Waverly honestly thought only happened in movies. 

 

“It’s nothing,” Nicole says, shrugging playfully as she covers their joined hands where Waverly is gently applying a band-aid in an attempt to provide Waverly some small comfort, she thinks. “I promise the next one will be better.”

 

“The next one?” Waverly asks with a watery smile. “There’s going to be a next one?” 

 

“There’ll be hundreds,” Nicole says with an exaggerated eye roll, and while the note in her voice is playful, Waverly knows she means it. “If I’m allowed to. If you’ll let me, I mean.” 

 

_ If you’ll let me in _ , Waverly reads between the lines. 

 

Their eyes meet and Waverly feels something stir deep in her blood like it’s been dormant from the day she was born, waiting for Nicole to come into her life and  _ wake _ it. 

 

Nicole’s so intuitive, though, she reads the softly panicked look on Waverly’s face, because this is all so overwhelming, and she wants it,  _ yes, _ but it’s all so new, too, and steers them gently back into less intense territory. 

 

“And in the meantime,” Nicole says, smiling as she tilts her head to the side in that way that always makes Waverly’s pulse skip. “If you decide to use this on either of them, I’ll  _ conveniently _ lose any complaints that come in, ok?”

 

Waverly laughs at that, a proper chuckle that lightens her whole frame, and she feels the pressure on her to have to do anything or make any decisions negate when Nicole smiles back at her. 

 

“That’s probably for the best,” Waverly says with a laugh. “I think one criminal in the family is enough.”

 

“Your sister isn’t a criminal, Wave,” Nicole replies gently, and Waverly understands what she’s doing, that she knows Waverly doesn’t think that, but that this is her showing her support regardless. “She was a child stuck in the worst situation imaginable.”

 

“Everyone else in this town thinks she is,” Waverly says a little sadly as she drops her head and smoothes the edges of the dressing down over Nicole’s hand. 

 

“Well, I don’t,” Nicole says firmly, and Waverly looks up to her with a soft smile that says  _ thank you _ . “I want you to know that, ok.”

 

“That means a lot, Nicole,” Waverly returns quietly. “It really does.”

 

There’s a second’s pause while she listens as their pulses align, and Waverly knows they’re still holding hands, but she’s not quite ready to let go just yet. 

 

They hear voices down the hallway, though, and Waverly gives Nicole’s hand one last gentle squeeze before she takes her hands back slowly. 

 

“I think you’re all patched up, Officer,” Waverly says softly, her words rippling through the still air around them, because it feels like time has stood still to allow them this small moment together. 

 

“You’d make a wonderful nurse, you know,” Nicole replies as she reaches for Waverly one last time, like she can’t help the movement. “Excellent bedside manner. Didn’t hurt at all.”

 

“Well, I’ll probably need to come in tomorrow and check it,” Waverly says, a smile turning the edge of her lip up. “You know, just to make sure everything’s ok.”

 

“Oh, of course,” Nicole smirks, trying to suppress its width at Waverly’s suggestion. “Absolutely. Because you never know….”

 

“Anything could happen between now and then,” Waverly says with mock-seriousness, and they both break away with another smile as they hear the voices come closer down the hall, and Nicole lets go of her hand one last time. “Now, you’d better get back to work before Nedley comes looking for you.”

 

“You’re right,” Nicole says, rolling her eyes as she stands up. “Or your sister for you. Hey, thanks again Wave.”

 

“You’re welcome,” Waverly blushes, and she feels shy now, but she wants to leave Nicole with something. So she understands what this little exchange has meant to her. “And you’ve got my number, right? If you need any nursing between now and then?”

 

Nicole smiles at Waverly’s incredibly transparent attempt at flirting, and she can feel Nicole biting her tongue like she wants to ask about Champ. 

 

Because this is more forward than Waverly’s been before, and she can feel that something is different, but she doesn’t want to put Waverly off at the same time. Or to ruin the moment with his name. 

 

“I definitely do,” Nicole nods. “And you have mine?” 

 

“I do,” Waverly says with a nervous pitter-patter in her pulse. “Maybe we could finally have that coffee we’ve been talking about. And you know,  _ talk… _ .”

 

“Yeah,” Nicole replies, and for a second, her eyes drop to Waverly’s lips. “Talk….”

 

“ _ Haught _ ,” comes Nedley’s voice from somewhere down the hallway, and it’s lucky really because Waverly doesn’t know how she would have walked away from Nicole without an outside prompt. 

 

Nicole rolls her eyes and Waverly stands, smiling as she pockets the mace, and Nicole gestures for her to walk out first. Her hand glances Waverly’s lower back, and Waverly glows at the gesture because it’s gentle and soft and warming, and it’s so  _ Nicole _ that Waverly has to bite her lip to control her smile. 

 

“Call me, ok?” Nicole says when they get to the door and point their feet in different directions. “If you want.”

 

“And you, too?” Waverly asks with a shy smile before Nedley’s voice sounds again. 

 

“ _ Coming _ ,” Nicole yells down the hall after it with another eye roll. “See you around, Wave.”

 

She winks at Waverly once before turning and walking away down the hall, and Waverly doesn’t move for a full five minutes. 

 

She replays their conversation over and over until Wynonna comes looking for her, shooting her with a frown when Waverly doesn't respond to her voice right away.

 

“ _ Yoo-hoo _ ,” Wynonna says, shaking her hand in front of Waverly. “Earth to baby-sister, what’s wrong with your face. Did you huff something from that first-aid kit? Are you high?”

 

_ No _ , Waverly thinks with one last smile when she feels the words write themselves on her bones. 

 

I’m  _ happy _ . 

  
  


-

  
  


The girls are as horrible as Waverly remembers; not Chrissy maybe, but the others, yes. 

 

Doc is a wonderful distraction in the end, but it doesn’t actually matter because all she can think about is Nicole. 

 

Nicole’s hands and Nicole’s smile and Nicole’s thoughtfulness and Nicole’s touch on her lower back. 

 

Nicole, Nicole, Nicole,  _ Nicole _ . 

 

But then things go to shit like they inevitably do, because she’s an Earp and that’s what happens around her family, and the deliveryman that wasn’t a stripper turns into a headcase trying to murder them, and Waverly kills him. 

 

She  _ kills _ him. 

 

And he was trying to murder them but  _ still… _ . god, she killed someone and she feels  _ sick _ . 

 

She feels like she’s going to be ill, and she’s panicking, and her first thought as she paces and paces and paces is  **Nicole** . I wish Nicole was here. Nicole would help me calm down. 

 

She doesn’t actually have time to freak out, though, because she moves from behind Doc’s back and she has a conversation with a witch. A real witch. With blue eyes and a dagger that brings the dead back to life, and she’s in the middle because the skull in her hands belongs to the witch's son. 

 

She throws it against the barn and it smashes and the witch  _ screams _ . Waverly follows the path of the broken bones against hard wood, and everything goes black before she comes to with Wynonna’s arms gentle around her own. 

 

And it’s bad because her arm hurts like hell and she  _ killed _ someone, but Wynonna is here now, and while she’s not the balm Nicole is, she helps. 

 

The sun rises slowly, and Waverly does with it, and before she can think Nicole’s name again, she’s t h e r e, climbing out the door of her squad car. 

 

The sun glances off the portion of her braid not tucked up under her hat, and she looks like royalty, hot like a flame in the light, and Waverly's breath catches from the porch.

 

There’s so much to look at in the yard, and Wynonna’s in front of her, but her eyes find Waverly’s irrespective of anything else, and Waverly feels something settle around her wrist and tug when she does. Like they’re joined now. 

 

Her eyes are soft and concerned, but she’s smiling at the sight of Waverly, too, and Waverly can’t help but smile back like her chest is full of stars. 

 

It’s strange, their interaction this time. It feels  _ different _ . 

 

Something has  **changed** . 

 

Because Waverly often feels shy around Nicole, but this is something  _ else, _ and Waverly thinks she knows why. 

 

Because there’s something between them now and they both know it. Even if Nicole doesn’t know things with Champ are over for sure, although Waverly thinks she can feel it, especially now. 

 

Things feel different. 

 

Neither one has actually said anything, but Waverly knows that’s just a matter of time now, once she can work up the courage. It’s just a matter of time before something happens. 

 

Because the wool blanket around her shoulders is keeping the chill off, but it’s Nicole’s smile across the freezing distance between them that’s keeping her warm. 

 

She half draws Chrissy inside, but she glances back up at Nicole, blushing when she catches her watching still, and she gives Nicole a little wave. It’s hesitant and almost cripplingly shy, but it means  _ more _ than the others have. 

 

Nicole smiles back and Waverly looks down and she means to turn inside, but she can’t help looking for Nicole once more, like she needs one more breath of air before a descent underwater. 

 

She looks up and that rope pulls and Nicole is watching her in a way that Waverly’s never seen before, but she thinks she knows what it means regardless, and it stops her heart.

 

Because she looks like she could be falling in love. 

 

-

  
  


Nicole is the wrong kind. 

 

She’s the wrong kind.

 

But Wynonna  _ isn’t _ . 

 

Waverly’s arm aches as Doc holds her to his chest, and his words are reassuring, but it doesn’t matter. 

 

Because Nicole was almost beaten half to death, and she looks in agony even hooked up to a morphine pump, and Waverly feels sick because she almost  _ died _ before Waverly had a chance to tell her how she feels.

 

Because Wynonna is  **gone** .

 

And she knows Doc and Dolls will go all the way to hell to find her, but this guy sounds like a lunatic and he sounds like a madman and what if they don’t get to her in time. 

 

She’s always cared about Wynonna, of course she has because she’s family, but it’s different now because she has come back into Waverly’s life  _ properly.  _ She’s given Waverly every part of herself in a way that she never has before, and for the first time in her entire life, Waverly feels like she has a sister. 

 

And now, her sister is gone.

 

She wants to go to Nicole, she wants to fall into her arms and come apart because she thinks Nicole would sweep her into her body more completely than anyone else has ever done and hold her close and whisper reassurances to her as she cries, but she can’t. 

 

Because if Waverly does and they don’t find….if they don’t  _ find _ …..

 

….then she doesn’t know if she’ll ever be able to pull herself together again. 

 

She sends the boys off with every piece of information she knows, and they promise that they’ll come back with Wynonna or they won’t come back at all and Waverly wants so desperately to go with them, but she knows she’ll only be in the way, a weak human hindrance, so she stays.

 

She lingers in the corridor after the others leave, and Nedley speaks with Nicole because she isn’t ready to go herself. Nicole can’t see Waverly from where she’s standing, so when he walks away, his footfalls disappearing down the hallway and Nicole thinks she’s alone, she drops the pretence of strength and  _ cries _ . 

 

It’s heartbreaking and Waverly wants to go to her immediately, but she doesn’t want to be there if Nicole doesn’t want her. The tears don’t stop though, they just go quiet which is worse, and Waverly can tell she’s in pain, and that it’s awful, so her feet take her towards Nicole’s bed without thinking. 

 

She’s quiet coming into the room, but Nicole hears her anyway, her body attuned to watch and her heart registering Waverly’s, too, she thinks, and she tries to pull herself together with a muffled  _ Wave, what are you still doing here. _

 

“You needed me,” Waverly says without thinking as she perches ever so lightly on the edge of Nicole’s bed and reaches for Nicole’s hand. “I thought maybe you needed me?”

 

Nicole lets out a half-smile, half-sob in pure and clear  _ relief, _ and she nods because words don’t come to her, but tears do, and when she tries to fight them, Waverly whispers gently as she squeezes Nicole’s hand. 

 

“It’s ok, Nicole,” Waverly says quiet and gentle, like snow, as she bites her lip to stop her own tears. For Nicole and for Wynonna and for this life she never damn-well asked for. “I know it hurts. You can cry. I’m not going anywhere.”

 

Nicole raises her other hand to cover her eyes, to hide herself or close the world out, Waverly isn’t sure, but Waverly moves forward regardless. She doesn’t want Nicole to sit up, but she knows she needs heavier comfort than their joined hands, so she leans in. 

 

It’s easy to shut her own grief out for a moment then, because Nicole  _ needs _ her, Nicole’s heart  **sings** for her, and she bends in response. 

 

She folds herself across the front of Nicole’s body gently, guarding against everything around them, tucking her head into the crook of Nicole’s shoulder as her chin rests on a knot of muscle. 

 

Nicole doesn’t move at first, she just cries a little harder, and Waverly wants to give her  _ something _ . She wants to give her respite and comfort, and the only way she can think to give it is skin to skin, so that’s what she does. 

 

She brushes her cheek against the column of Nicole’s neck, and it would be so easy to press a kiss to her pulse, but now is not the time. Now is for reassurance and softness and for Waverly to memorise the scent of her faded perfume and the aura that is so distinctly  _ Nicole _ . 

 

She fits her hand over Nicole’s hip as she hugs as gently as she can, and she knows it’s probably crossing a line, but Nicole is crying and Waverly wants to help so she does. 

 

She still hasn’t moved and Waverly’s about to shift back softly because maybe she has assumed too much, but then the hand that’s covering her eyes shifts and sets across Waverly’s back lightly and Waverly sighs in her own relief. 

 

“It’s going to be ok,” Waverly whispers again to the shell of Nicole’s ear as her hand splays and then contracts, bunching Waverly’s top as Nicole pulls her closer ever so gently. “I’m not going anywhere and it’s going to be ok.” 

 

They stay that way for a minute, or maybe an hour, Waverly isn’t sure, but she feels like she could stay there forever. Eventually Nicole’s sobs slow and her breath starts to level out and Waverly knows what this is, it’s a crash after pain and terror and tears. 

 

Nicole’s hand loosens and her body slackens and Waverly knows she’s on the edge of sleep, and the best thing is for Nicole’s body to accept it and not fight it, so she slides her jaw against Nicole’s neck softly one last time and breathes a lullaby to her blood. 

 

“Sleep, Nicole,” Waverly says and it’s promise and dream both. “I’ll be here when you wake.”

  
  


-

  
  


The seven are gone. 

 

They bring Wynonna back, alive, and she says she’s ok, but Waverly knows she’s not. 

 

Because she burns the photograph of them, but there’s no relief in her eyes, and she sleeps with Peacemaker beneath her pillow or in her arms when Waverly comes down the stairs to check on her, and there’s a dullness to her that Waverly has never seen before. 

 

There’s only so much she can do, though, only so many soft platitudes and gentle hugs she can offer Wynonna before she realises nothing she does is going to make things better. 

 

Nicole is a different matter altogether. 

 

Because she’d stayed and watched and talked when Nicole woke before she’d fallen asleep again, and Waverly had told her in a quiet whisper as she’d begun to drift that Champ wasn’t in the picture anymore, that Champ was gone and in the gaps between her words, that Waverly could maybe be hers, if Nicole wanted. 

 

She’d had to leave when Wynonna had come back, because as much as all she wanted to do was stay, Nicole didn’t need her now. But Wynonna did. 

 

Wynonna did, so Waverly had gone home and sat on her bed with a loaded gun beside her as she’d watched like stone out the window of the top bedroom, only laying down to rest when she saw Nicole’s squad car at the road-side, guarding  _ her _ now. 

  
  


-

  
  


She remembers waking sometime in the pre-dawn light and almost breaking because in the dark she can hear nothing but her own voice and doubt, and what if she’s not  _ enough _ . 

 

Because she knows she likes Nicole, really,  _ really _ likes her, but what if that’s not enough. 

 

What if  _ she’s _ not enough. 

 

Because she’s not experienced. She’s never been with another woman before, never even kissed one, and what if she’s awful. 

 

A crueller voice speaks to her, too. 

 

_ You’re damaged goods, Waverly Earp _ , it says. She won’t want you. Not when she learns how deep the mess goes. 

 

She knows Nicole is different, though; she  _ knows _ Nicole is different. 

 

The mantra runs into her blood again and again and again as the light rises. 

 

Nicole is different, Nicole is different, Nicole is  **different** . 

 

But what if Waverly’s  _ still not enough _ . 

  
  


-

  
  


They haven’t spoken since the hospital, and Waverly had agonised over sending her a text, but she hadn’t wanted their first interaction after the hospital to be over the phone. She wanted it to be in person. 

 

Only it’s hard, because Waverly knows she’s been asking questions. About Jack and about the time capsule attack and about the strange things that no one else in this town is brave enough to ask about, and Waverly feels awful because she wants to tell Nicole  _ everything _ , because she trusts her, but Dolls has been absolute on that. 

 

No one else is to know. 

 

And honestly, it makes Waverly beyond furious, because this isn’t  _ his _ secret to hold and guard and police who gets to know. It’s hers and Wynonna’s and Doc’s. The people who live it. It’s their forebearers’ and their children’s, but it’s not Dolls’s. 

 

And if she wants to tell Nicole, she should be allowed, but she’s not. 

 

And she knows it’s only a matter of time before Nicole asks Waverly herself, and she’s not sure she’ll be able to hold back, because something in her recoils at ever being dishonest with Nicole. Even beneath Dolls’s orders. 

 

She also knows it’s only a matter of time before she sees Nicole again, and she’s excited, but god, she’s nervous, too. She’s nervous for her to ask about what she knows Waverly knows, and she’s nervous to be near her because her feelings are absolute now, and she’s almost come to terms with them, but her doubt still unsettles her blood. 

 

She runs into Nicole before long, quite literally, and they have a brief exchange, and Nicole’s hand is warm on her lower back and elbow as she leads Waverly down the side of the road, and Waverly thinks they’re talking about the same thing, but they’re  _ definitely _ not, and before she can backtrack and apologise, Nicole is gone in a breeze of hurt and confusion, and Waverly’s left in a cloud of the same. 

 

She goes to Shorty’s, because she just needs someone, Wynonna or Gus or someone, and Gus is there, but so is bad news and more than a little bit of heartache. 

 

She’s selling Shorty’s. 

 

It’s not a surprise if Waverly’s totally honest, because the bar was never hers, it was Shorty’s, and he’s gone. He’s gone, and with it the only safety and security and home that Waverly had known for a long,  _ long _ time. 

 

Gus assures her that she can keep her job and tries to hand her a cheque with far too many zeros on it, but it isn’t about that, it’s about losing stability and something she knows, when everything else is spinning around her. 

 

It’s too much. 

 

It’s all too much. Losing Shorty’s and dumping Champ, everything with Nicole, and Wynonna the demon killer, it’s too much change, and Waverly needs  _ air _ . 

 

Her head is swimming and she just needs a breeze at her neck and cold, and even though it’s almost freezing out, she just w a l k s. 

 

Nicole texts her after long, a quick and brief  _ I’m sorry, Waverly. Can we talk? Could I come pick you up? _

 

And she’s pissed, because whether she meant it or not, Nicole had dismissed her, and it’s just too much on top of everything else competing to knock the wind from her lungs today. 

 

Waverly knows it wasn’t intentional, because Nicole would  _ never _ talk to her like that unless she was lost in her head about something else, which she was, but she can’t deny it didn’t sting. Especially coming from Nicole. 

 

But Waverly knows she was distracted, and she knows she didn’t mean it, and she’s still pissed, but she can’t deny the flutter that moves in her belly when she feels her phone vibrate somewhere in her numerous coats and she sees  _ Nicole Haught _ on the screen instead of  _ Wynonna Earp _ . 

 

She’s still upset, but the only thing she can think to make it better is Nicole. 

 

_ I don’t know _ , she replies.  _ Somewhere on the edge of town _ , and Nicole is there in a moment. 

 

She’s there, and Waverly can breathe a little easier, but she makes it harder, too. Because she wants this, Waverly knows she wants this, she wants Nicole, but she just needs everything to slow down for a second so she can catch her breath. 

 

It’s a strange contradiction waging war in her head, because she wants space, but she wants Nicole, too, and Nicole doesn’t help at all, not when she makes Waverly blush with soft words and  _ don’t you make me use it _ . 

 

Waverly holds out for exactly five seconds, or the same length of time she can avoid Nicole’s gaze for, because she knows as soon as their eyes meet that she’ll cave. 

 

She’ll give in, because she’s angry and confused, but it’s Nicole. And above all else, that’s what she wants. 

 

She slides into the car and Nicole apologises and she  _ means _ it and she tries to set them on a track to actually talk about it, about  _ them _ . But then Waverly’s hand closes around the cheque in her pocket, and her brain just short-circuits, because she wants Nicole, but it’s all too much. 

 

She loses it and goes off on a tangent, and Nicole reaches for her. Her hand is soft and smooth on Waverly’s thigh, and it warms her whole body, Nicole’s touch, but that only makes her panic more. 

 

She regrets the words as soon as they’re out of her mouth. 

 

They’re stupid and she doesn’t even mean them, but everything is changing and moving too fast, and she just needs a bit of quiet. 

 

_ Just friends _ . 

 

It takes her breath away, because she sees how much they hurt Nicole, because she may as well have slipped a knife between her ribs, the pain in her eyes is so deep, and she can see her shut down immediately. 

 

“Sure, Waverly. Whatever you want.” 

 

Her voice is frustrated and disappointed and a little cold, and Waverly understands, but it hurts, having Nicole look at her like that. Having Nicole speak to her like that. 

 

Because Nicole is patient and she’s kind and she’s soft, and she’s always spoken to Waverly like she’s a little more than a friend, even from their first conversation. 

 

But this isn’t her Nicole. This is the Nicole everyone else gets. Deputy Haught. Not  _ Nicole _ . 

 

She regrets her words immediately, and she wants to take them back and fix this now, but something in her gut tells her Nicole needs a little time. She needs a little space before Waverly apologises so she can be sure that Waverly  _ means _ it and isn’t just trying to backtrack because she can tell she’s hurt Nicole’s feelings. 

 

Nicole drops her back in town, just outside the bar, and their drive back has been quiet although Nicole’s thoughts are loud like their heartbeats against the gentle hum of the radio. Nicole’s eyes are locked firmly on the road during their short journey, and Waverly’s not even sure if Nicole’s going to look at her to say goodbye. 

 

She does though, thank goodness, and honestly, it’s enough to make Waverly want to cry because she looks exhausted. She looks beaten. She looks like Waverly’s taken away the hope that’s been keeping her buoyant during this shit-storm of a week, and now that it’s gone, she can’t be bothered kicking to keep herself afloat. 

 

“We’ll talk soon?” Waverly asks with a slight quiver in her voice as her hand wraps around the door handle. 

 

“Sure, Waverly,” Nicole says with a little grimace, and it looks like it pains her to speak and all she really wants to do is hold her hand to her chest against the ache Waverly can almost see. 

 

“Thank you for the ride,” Waverly tries softly. “It was really cold out there.”

 

“Anytime,” Nicole replies sadly, and that hurts, too, because Waverly knows then beyond reason of a doubt that Nicole means that, irrespective of what their future together holds. That she’ll be there for Waverly regardless, and it makes Waverly feel even more awful. 

 

The speech she’s been practising on the ride back almost falls off her tongue, but she knows now isn’t the right time, so she climbs out of the car instead and tries not to clutch at her own chest when the invisible string around her heart  _ tugs _ . 

  
  


-

  
  


Words won’t be enough, Waverly thinks as she marches over to the Sheriff’s station. Nicole will believe them, she hopes, but she needs to do more. She needs to  _ show _ Nicole how much she’s in this. That she is scared, and everything’s still too fast, but she needs this, that she needs  _ her _ more than breathing. 

 

Because she’s scared about this thing with Nicole, but this afternoon, seeing what it might be like to have Nicole only be Nicole and not  _ her _ Nicole, that had been terrifying. 

 

Like flicking a switch, she knows what she needs to do. 

 

Waverly needs to  _ show _ her. 

  
  


-

  
  


She needs to do this now, before she loses her nerve. 

 

And she knows it’s going to look impulsive and maybe a little crazy, but it’s not. Because Waverly’s never thought about anything more in her entire life. 

 

She bursts into the station in a flurry of fur and jacket and she sweeps past Nicole and flips the blinds, and Nicole’s moving around her, close but careful not to touch in case that’s not what Waverly wants, and then when the outside world is gone, blocked out by small wooden slats, she turns and she takes the earth away. 

  
  


-

  
  


Nicole’s lips are soft, and her hands are gentle but firm around Waverly’s waist, and she stops them because she’s a gentlewoman. 

 

Because even with her heart’s desire in her hands, she stops to make sure Waverly’s ok. That she means this. That this is what she wants. 

 

And Waverly blushes and trips over an explanation while Nicole smiles - no  _ beams _ \- and then they’re moving again. Nicole is winding Waverly’s scarf around her hands, pulling her closer and closer until Waverly can feel Nicole’s breath, cinnamon and a little sweet like the gum she chews, against her lips and damn her if it isn’t the most arousing thing anyone’s ever done to her. 

 

“Maybe you should make me.”

 

Waverly’s stomach drops and then Nicole is kissing, kissing, kissing, and god, it’s breathtaking, and Waverly doesn’t know how she’s ever going to stop. 

  
  


-

  
  


One second she’s leaning over Nicole, and the next she’s on her back and Nicole is between her thighs, and Waverly’s brain is ready to blow a damn fuse. 

 

It’s running a million miles an hour because Nicole is warm and she’s not heavy or oppressive, she’s just the right amount of weight against Waverly’s own. 

 

Her kisses are eager like Waverly can feel how much Nicole wants this being held back on a chain,  _ for now, _ because she doesn’t want to scare Waverly away, but she can feel the emotion in it still. She can feel the desire, and it floors her because she’s never felt anything remotely close to this in her entire life. 

 

She’s lost the ability to speak outside of soft moans that threaten to grow louder and louder, and then Nicole pulls Waverly’s thigh up over her waist and Waverly  _ falls _ . 

  
  


-

  
  


She’s not quite sure how, but somewhere they stop. 

 

Not that she would have herself, because she’s never really had self-control worthy of being envious over, but because Nicole slows and puts distance between them gently, because she doesn’t want to do this here. 

 

She wants to do this when they have time, without constraints, and not on the ratty old couch she’s seen Nedley sleep on. 

 

She sends Waverly away with a promise, with another quick kiss, because if they linger, Waverly will never leave. 

 

Waverly walks down the footpath, back in the vague direction of her Jeep, and she can’t stop touching her lips or her neck because they burn, deliciously and delicately, they  _ burn _ . 

 

Her lips burn and her body smoulders and she can feel the ghost of Nicole’s touch  _ everywhere _ . 

 

And it’s not like she has a bucket of experience to draw on, but this feels different. It’s so vastly different to Champ that Waverly can’t even compare them because Nicole is everything that Champ wasn’t. 

 

She’s patient and kind even though she very clearly wanted to tear Waverly’s clothes off with her teeth, and she stopped to check Waverly was ok, and she kissed her like it was for Waverly’s pleasure more than her own, and that is an entirely new concept to her, that her lover wants that before their own resolution. 

 

She doesn’t really know where she’s walking to, but the stars feel brighter now. Because this afternoon she thought she’d broken everything but now, now she can see everything. 

 

Her phone goes off in her pocket again, and she pulls it out to find a message from Nicole. 

 

_ Nicole Haught: _

_ I can’t stop smiling. Was that a dream? Are you real? I wish we didn’t have to cut that short but I get off in a few hours if you want me to call by. We could finish that talk…. _

 

Waverly’s grin makes her cheeks ache, and her heart is pounding sure and steady like Nicole is calling it from halfway across town, so she sends a reply, calling Nicole back to her. 

 

She’s felt conflicted for so long and her head is tired from constantly talking about every missed opportunity, every time she could have done something different around Nicole, over-analysing every angle of Nicole’s smile and movement of her hands, but now that she knows what Nicole’s heart feels like beneath her hands, everything has settled. 

 

Everything makes sense. 

 

Everything is clear. 

 

Her phone is warm in her hand and the moon is bright above her, but her heart feels even  _ stronger _ . 

  
  


-

  
  


“I feel like a teenager,” Nicole laughs as she adjusts her position between Waverly’s legs. 

 

They’re spread out as much as physically possible in the back seat of the cruiser, Waverly on her back with Nicole above her. 

 

It’s not the way Waverly thought she would have ended up spending her evening, but who is she to complain. 

 

Nicole had called to pick her up after her shift because they haven’t seen each other since Waverly had thrown caution and worry to the wind and kissed her, and Waverly would be lying if she said she hadn’t been counting down the minutes until she could see Nicole again. 

 

Until she could kiss Nicole again. 

 

Just to make sure it was as good as she remembers. 

 

Because now that she  _ can _ think about it, now that the flame between them has been  **lit** , Waverly can think of little else. 

 

All she can picture is the way Nicole’s body curves so naturally around her own, or the way her hands squeeze firm and tight, but not demanding. The way she’s produced more heat between Waverly’s thighs than she can ever remember there being before. 

 

And all they’d been doing was  _ kissing _ . Well, kissing and a little heavy petting, but Nicole had Waverly fit to combust. It’s all so very new to her, this active sexuality, because now that she thinks about it, she’s never really enjoyed sex, not really, but this….just  _ kissing _ ….god, she doesn’t know how on earth she’s going to survive when Nicole actually  **touches** her. 

 

Honestly, she knows she has absolutely zero experience, and no idea what to do, and it might be different when their clothes start falling to the floor, but Waverly feels so comfortable, so safe with Nicole that she will happily give Nicole everything,  _ now _ . But she knows Nicole wouldn’t accept it, not yet. Even though Waverly knows she wants it, too, more than breathing, just like Waverly does. 

 

Because she treats Waverly like she’s special, like she’s made of rose gold and lace, and she will make sure their first is special, too. Not ceremonial, per se, but careful; something Waverly will remember forever.  

 

And while she wants that, too, it’s harder and harder to rationalise why they should wait with Nicole between her thighs right now, pushing down. 

 

She’d counted the seconds as Nicole drove to collect her, and Waverly had met her outside the homestead with nervous hands and a shy heart, because things were different before but now they’ve  _ changed _ . 

 

Coy. Waverly had felt coy climbing into the car, blushing at the way Nicole had beamed when she’d slid into the passenger's seat, and there had been a beat when her eyes had fallen to Waverly’s lips like she wanted to lean forward, but hadn’t wanted to assume, hadn’t wanted to push Waverly beyond what she was comfortable with. 

 

But she  _ was _ comfortable. Nervous but comfortable, and  _ very _ turned on, because her brain was already five steps ahead, eying up the room in the backseat like she hadn’t been thinking that since she’d read  _ car _ and  _ pick you up.  _ Nicole managed a slightly gravelly  _ hi _ before Waverly had closed the difference and met Nicole with a sigh that hit low in her bones. 

 

They’d met across the console in a tangle of limbs as Waverly had tried to crawl into Nicole’s lap as much as possible given the barrier before Nicole had gasped  _ backseat _ in question and Waverly hadn’t been able to drag her there fast enough. 

 

“I feel like we should probably talk properly before….” Nicole had tried. Waverly had nodded with a shy but slightly dangerous smile. 

 

“Yes,” Waverly nodded before her hands had pulled Nicole more firmly on top of her. “Absolutely. A hundred times, yes. But later, please. Because all I’ve been able to think about since yesterday has been kissing you, and now that you’re here, right here, I don’t think I can  _ not _ .”

 

“But later?” Nicole had asked with a wry smile like she knew they needed to talk as well, but she’d rather give in for now. That the pause was pretense and she’d  _ much _ rather be doing something else with her lips. 

 

“Later, we’ll talk until you’re hoarse, I promise,” Waverly had purred. “But for now, just kiss me Nicole. Please.”

 

“Try and stop me,” Nicole had said with a smirk before she  _ had _ . 

 

Which is exactly how they’d found themselves in this exact position, Waverly with her skirt rucked up and her shirt half open and her hands up Nicole’s equally undone counterpart, breathing heavily. 

 

“I don’t even think I did this as a teenager,” Waverly says with a sigh. “Actually, I know I didn’t.”

 

“First time for everything, huh?” Nicole asks, leaning back as the moon strikes the black of her eyes through the tinted windows. 

 

Waverly shivers and it uncoils a deeper warmth between Waverly’s thighs, because while she knows Nicole will never give in to her in the backseat of her car, she knows she will somewhere, soon. 

 

She knows it’s not the height of romanticism, making out in the backseat of the car, but they can’t go back to the homestead, and Nicole’s Place is on the other side of town, and Waverly couldn’t wait, neither of them could. 

 

It doesn’t matter that they’re laid out across the cruiser, though, because Nicole touches her like they’re both wrapped in silk. She checks in constantly,  _ is this ok, can I kiss you here _ , and she knows Nicole is only so careful because they’re so new to each other and their bodies are unfamiliar still, but it’s beyond touching, having someone put her above their own pleasure. 

 

And while Nicole is soft and cautious, god, there’s pleasure, too. 

 

Because Nicole is warm against her core, and she seems to know exactly how heavily to lay her body against Waverly so that she’s not heavy, or oppressive, but enough that Waverly feels. 

 

God-damn does she  _ feel _ . 

 

Nicole’s weight is incredible, but it’s only one piece of the puzzle, because her hands are everywhere and her lips move from Waverly’s own before they drop to her pulse. She sucks the warmth of Waverly’s neck between her teeth and Waverly has to do her level best not to issue an embarrassingly loud moan. 

 

Nicole draws back with a smirk when she catches Waverly biting her lip in an attempt to silence herself, and she bites her own as she looks down at Waverly with an expression that says she cannot believe she’s here. That this is actually happening. 

 

“You don’t have to do that you know,” Nicole says, leaning down and brushing a soft, shy touch over Waverly’s hip. 

 

“Do what?” Waverly asks as she props herself up on her elbows. 

 

“Hold that lovely sound in,” Nicole says with a smirk and Waverly blushes almost instantly, a throb settling low between her thighs. 

 

“You mean….” Waverly asks around her quickly reddening cheeks, and Nicole nods encouragingly when she trails off. 

 

“I never want you to hold anything in,” Nicole says softly as she looks to Waverly and Waverly  _ sees _ . “I meant it when I said I’d never ask you to be anything you’re not, Wave.”

 

“Champ didn’t like it,” Waverly admits a little shyly, and she mentally admonishes herself for mentioning him. She expects Nicole to bristle at the mention of his name, but she doesn’t, she just waits patiently for Waverly to finish. “When I made any noise, I mean. He used to say it put him off.”

 

“He’s a dick, Wave,” Nicole deadpans, and Waverly can’t help but grin in response. “He’s a dick, and I promise you, be as loud as you want; your  _ noises _ won’t put me off.”

 

“They won’t?” Waverly asks as she frowns, because it might seem silly, but the extent of her knowledge with anything sexual stems from him. She knows it has given her a decidedly warped view of things, so much so that she doesn’t know what’s actually ok, what’s normal, relatively speaking, and what’s not. 

 

“They definitely won’t,” Nicole whispers with a smile that spells trouble as she leans down low against Waverly’s body. “Actually, I love them. They let me know I’m doing a good job.”

 

“You’re  _ definitely _ doing a good job,” Waverly says shyly, but there’s a strength beneath her skin now that wasn’t there a moment ago, because Nicole wants her. All of her. And that makes her  **hot** . 

 

“I am?” Nicole questions as she slides her forefinger beneath Waverly’s chin and tilts her head back.

 

“You are,” Waverly says nodding, emboldened by the way Nicole’s pupils blow a little wider and her gaze keeps dropping to Waverly’s lips. 

 

She leans in, so slowly that Waverly’s body  _ aches _ as it waits for Nicole’s lips to make contact with her own, but when they do, it’s worth it. Her tongue slides into Waverly’s mouth, warm and wet and wanting, and while Nicole had kissed her on that couch, this is different. 

 

This is damn near combustible. 

 

She doesn’t stop the groan that rises from her lungs this time, not that she thinks she could even if she’d wanted to because Nicole’s hands are on the sliver of skin at her waist, thumbing across goosebumps, and her thigh is solid against Waverly’s core, and her lips feel like they’re up against poison ivy because they burn, burn,  _ burn _ . 

 

The noise moves from her soul into Nicole’s lungs, and the redhead writhes at the sound, and when she pulls away finally with a moan of her own, Waverly feels her stomach twist because Nicole’s eyes are solid black and her face is flushed and she looks like a goddess. 

 

“That’s better,” Nicole says, and her voice is low and gravelly, and if Nicole would agree, Waverly would have her, here. Now. Immediately. 

 

But part of her wants to wait now, too, because if this is what Nicole can do in the backseat of a police car, what on  _ earth _ can she do in a bed where they can move. 

 

“You’re sure?” Waverly asks with a small smile, and she’s not sure if Nicole will catch it, but there’s another question there 

 

“Waverly Earp,” Nicole breathes, and she sounds strong, certain. Clear. “I have  _ never _ been more sure of anything in my entire life.”

 

And she can see in that moment, just how deep Nicole’s affection goes, because she  _ means _ it. 

 

“Neither have I,” Waverly says with a whisper, and the answering grin Nicole radiates could damn well out-shine the sun. 

 

Waverly takes a deep breath, summoning bravery she doesn’t feel, and reaches for Nicole’s spare hand. She moves it up her body to rest over her heart because she wants Nicole to feel what she’s doing to her, how much she’s driving Waverly crazy, but that’s not all. 

 

She shifts Nicole’s hand, leading it with her own to cover her breast, and Nicole’s skimmed them before now, but she hasn’t properly _ touched _ , and Waverly wants that now. She needs it. 

 

Nicole’s touch is light at first, but her gaze is heavy, and she’s looking to Waverly for affirmation before she loses herself completely to Waverly’s body. 

 

“You’re sure?” Nicole asks, and she is flawless in her hesitance. In her respect. And even though her heart is pounding and her breath is swollen, it’s the easiest thing in the world for Waverly to nod. 

 

“Nicole Haught,” Waverly says in an echo as her smile breaks and she closes her hand above Nicole’s, squeezing. Her touch  _ firm _ as Nicole shudders. 

 

“I have never been more sure of anything in my entire life.”

  
  


-

  
  


They use the quiet as much as they can, to steal touches and kisses, and it’s like nothing Waverly’s ever experienced before, wanting someone like this. 

 

Being wanted in return.  

 

Nicole’s hand is soft but leading on her wrist as she draws Waverly into Nedley’s office. Their lips almost glance, and Waverly can feel the heat pouring off them, but then Wynonna comes in, flustered, and Waverly has to temper her own desire because Wynonna breathes a revelation that’s not really a revelation and they have to step apart. 

 

For a second Waverly thinks Wynonna will catch the position of their bodies relative to each other and  _ ask, _ but she doesn’t, as lost in her own head as she is, and Waverly breathes a sigh of relief because she’ll tell Wynonna, soon, but not yet. 

 

Not yet. 

 

The imprint left by Nicole’s fingers on her wrist burns like the thirst in her throat, and she wants to fall back onto that couch and pull Nicole between her thighs, but she can’t. 

 

Not yet. 

 

Because they need time; they need days and days to touch.

 

But they can’t, because Wynonna comes home from the convent in the snow with a stranger who looks just a little too much like her sister and  _ changes everything _ . 

  
  
  


-

  
  


“Nicole, it’s me. Look, I know you’re on your way, but something happened and I need to rain-check. Something….well, good I suppose, but…. Listen, I can’t really talk about it just yet, but I’ll explain everything when I can. I’ll try and call again when I get a minute.”

 

_ Pause. _

 

A  **breath** . 

 

“I wish you could be here with me; this is so weird, and I think I’m a little scared, I mean Wynonna’s here, but…. I just wish you could be here, too. I’ll call you ok, maybe text me when you get this? Shit, I’ve gotta go. Call me, ok? Please?”

  
  


-

  
  


“I’m ok, I just….something happened, Nicole. I kinda got a little bit shot, well grazed actually, if we’re splitting hairs, but I’m ok. Wynonna is taking me to the hospital now if you want to meet us there, but it’s ok if you don’t because I’m ok, Nicole, really I am. I’d like to see you if you wanted, though? That’d be nice? Because Wynonna is great, but she’s not much of a nurse, and I think you might do a much better job, but it’s ok if you don’t want to….I mean if you want to. I’m rambling, I’m sorry. Dolls gave me a shot of something for the pain and it’s kinda making my head spin. I’m ok, but come, if you can. Maybe, I need you a little?”

  
  


-

  
  


Willa is home. 

 

She’s home and it’s great, it’s wonderful because she’s family but something about it makes Waverly nervous. 

 

They’ve never gotten along, ever, and Waverly knows it’s been almost two decades, but the unease that was between them as children is alive and well in Willa’s adult incarnation. 

 

She’d been rude and harsh at best when they were younger, and malicious at worst, and just having her in the house makes Waverly’s skin prickle. 

 

She watches Nicole, too, because Nicole is here, by her side, and Wynonna might not have put two and two together, but she thinks Willa has. 

 

It’s not like she’s hiding Nicole from Wynonna, it’s not that at all, it’s just….she’s scared, she supposes. 

 

Because they’ve found a beautiful kinship now, she and Wynonna, she’s Waverly’s best friend and guard dog, and she’s sure Wynonna will be fine, that she’ll be ok with everything, but if she’s not….

 

She won’t give up Nicole regardless, though, whether Wynonna is ok or not. 

 

And she knows it might sound harsh, because Wynonna is family and family should come first, but Waverly knows it’s not that simple in the real world. Because Nicole feels like she could be her soulmate, and while she wants to believe Wynonna won’t leave again, Waverly won’t risk losing what could very well be the love of her life over that kind of uncertainty. 

 

That’s all everything feels like at the moment; uncertain. Like the future balances on a knife edge and Waverly has no idea how anything is going to fall. 

 

Because she’s nervous around Willa, and she knows Wynonna is cautious, too.

 

And so is Nicole. 

 

Nicole is cautious, and if she’s honest, that’s what unsettles her the most. Because Nicole doesn’t know half of the strange things Willa used to taunt Waverly with as a child, and she still frowns every time Willa walks into a room. 

 

She’s different when Willa is around, and Waverly isn’t sure if it’s a conscious thing or not, but she is. 

 

She puts herself bodily between the two of them like a shield, and she stays close by Waverly’s side when she can’t. She’s watching,  _ always _ watching, like she’s waiting for Willa to snap. 

 

Willa catches them in the barn, and it’s the absolute worst thing that could happen because Waverly hasn’t told Wynonna, and this is the kind of thing Willa used to hold her hostage with. All she wants to do is sink back into that bed with Nicole’s weight as armor because she thought this was going to be it, that this was their time, but fate has other plans. 

 

As does Willa. 

 

It makes Waverly ache afterwards, it makes her d r e a m. Because they were so close, and every day Nicole doesn’t touch her like that is a waste because it feels like the end of the world is within arm’s reach. 

 

**I’m sorry we were interrupted earlier** , she sends to Nicole later.  **I’m really, really sorry.**

 

_ It’s ok, Wave _ , comes the reply.  _ So am I _ . 

 

**I can’t stop thinking about you** , Waverly sends, and her cheeks warm because she’s new to this whole flirting with girls thing, but she’s getting better. And they lost today, but that doesn’t mean they have to lose everything. 

 

_ Neither can I _ , Nicole sends back.  _ What are you thinking about? Will you tell me? _

 

**What would have happened if Willa hadn’t come in,** Waverly sends back, pretense gone. 

 

_ And that was?  _ Nicole returns, and Waverly knows she’s being intentionally coy now, because she wants Waverly to tell her openly. She’s trying to draw out her blush. 

 

**That you’d finally touch me,** Waverly says, because if that’s what Nicole wants, if that will stoke the fire in Nicole’s blood hotter to the point where she won’t be able to  _ not _ touch Waverly the next time they meet alone, she’s more than happy to oblige.  **That you wouldn’t stop.**

 

_ You wouldn’t want me to? _ Nicole asks, and Waverly can picture her biting her lip as her brow wrinkles and she waits for Waverly’s response.  _ Stop, that is. You wouldn’t want me to stop? _

 

**Absolutely not,** Waverly returns. 

 

_ God, you have no idea how badly I want that, Wave, _ Nicole replies and Waverly can imagine her lying back on her bed then, arching her spine against the mattress in frustration.  _ No idea.  _

 

**Don’t I?** , Waverly says, and Nicole’s smirk is clear in her mind’s eye. 

 

Its bold, her next reply. Bolder than Waverly has ever been before in her life, and they haven’t even done this in person, but it feels like another world, this moment, not joined to their own, and she’s nervous, but she feels safe, too. 

 

It’s like nothing else she’s ever experienced, like she’s about to come out of her skin with physical need because her hands  _ burn _ for Nicole, and her core, too, and if there was even a sliver of possibility that she could get out of this house unnoticed, she’d already be in the damn Jeep on her way to Nicole’s 

 

**Tell me what you’d do, if we hadn’t been interrupted.**

 

_ You’re sure?  _ Nicole asks, because she’s still so careful not to push, but Waverly knows Nicole’s blood is on fire, too. 

 

**Please** , she sends back.  **I need you, and if I can’t have you, you’ll just have to give me something to think about.**

 

Her phone rings as she’s halfway through trying to do the same, and when Nicole speaks, her voice is low and quiet and rough, but it’s so heavy with desire that Waverly  _ throbs _ , the heat between her thighs almost unbearable. 

 

“I’d start kissing you, Wave,” Nicole whispers like it’s a prayer, and Waverly can feel the ghost of Nicole’s lips on her neck, around her pulse and over the strain of tendons, and Waverly’s hand  _ slides _ down her stomach. 

 

“I’d start kissing you, and I’d never stop.”

  
  


-

  
  


“Will you do something for me?” Nicole asks as Waverly falls into step with her, the two of them hurrying to pick up a few small things before the party, later that night. 

 

“Of course,” Waverly says, turning her body as she looks up to Nicole. “Anything.”

 

“Please don’t read too much into this, and don’t ask me to justify myself just yet, because I can’t, Wave. It’s just a gut thing, but….” she trails off like she’s nervous. Like she doesn’t know how to word what she wants to say. “Just….don’t be alone with her, ok? With Willa, I mean. Make sure Wynonna or Doc or someone is with you, ok?” 

 

Waverly goes quiet, and it’s not because she’s mad, it’s because Nicole has voiced exactly what’s been worrying her, too. 

 

“I know it’s not my place, and it’s asking too much, but something feels wrong, Wave. In my gut, something feels wrong. And I’m never wrong, not about things like this.”

 

“Ok,” Waverly says as she stops walking, pulling at Nicole’s wrist gently in an attempt to get her to slow, too. She moves her thumbs over Nicole’s palms in an attempt to calm her. “Of course. Of  _ course _ , Nicole.”

 

Nicole smiles, a half-worried, half-relieved thing, and Waverly feels a little less scared in herself because Nicole is with her on this now, too. She’s not alone. 

 

Because Wynonna wants too badly for everything to be fine, because it’s half a ton lifted off of her shoulders, that she wasn’t responsible for her sister’s death as well as her father’s, but it’s blinding her to the fact that the Willa that’s come back isn’t the one that left them. 

 

Nicole nods and she raises Waverly’s hands to her lips and presses a quick  _ thank you _ amongst kisses, and Waverly breathes a little easier. 

 

Not for long, though. 

 

Not for long. 

 

Waverly should have listened. 

 

She should have  _ known _ . 

  
  


-

  
  


Nicole calls her a vision, but she’s the diamond in the crown. 

 

_ God, she’s flawless _ , Waverly thinks as she descends the staircase. Flawless. Because Waverly’s never seen Nicole in formalwear like this, and it takes her breath away. 

 

Her dress clings beautifully, and she’s looking at Waverly like she can’t believe Waverly is real, while simultaneously looking like she wants to pull Waverly into a quiet corner and eat her alive. 

 

She says something, but it’s mostly a blur, because she’s stunning and she’s here and she’s Waverly’s to kiss, no one else’s. 

 

Waverly says something about accessorising, but it’s not exactly coherent because her brain is back at the top of the stairs with her sanity, and she doesn’t want Nicole to move away just yet. 

 

As though she’s read Waverly’s mind, Nicole reaches for the bracelet at her own wrist, sliding it off and onto Waverly’s, and the action grounds her. 

 

She knows it’s just a piece of jewellery, but it’s  _ Nicole’s _ and she’s wearing it, and suddenly Waverly’s head is full of visions of her waking up in one of Nicole’s loose tees or curling up on the couch wearing Nicole’s academy sweatshirt that has holes in the cuffs that Nicole always tries to hide in the bottom of her gear bag because she’s embarrassed about how ratty it is. 

 

Visions of their future. 

 

The bracelet is warm even though the metal should be cold, and Nicole beams, and it’s full of a promise of more and possibility and  _ light, _ before Willa calls for her like Waverly’s place is at her side and not Nicole’s, and everything goes to hell. 

  
  


-

  
  


“I’d better slow you down then.”

  
  


-

  
  


Waverly doesn’t think she’s ever been so terrified in her entire life. 

 

Not when the revenants came for Daddy, or when she found out Wynonna was gone, or in the first few seconds when she’d kissed Nicole for the first time, nothing. 

 

The shot is so loud and Nicole’s body hits the wall so hard that Waverly doesn’t know how she couldn’t  _ not _ be….

 

The gasp falls without her permission, unbidden and broken, and she’s on her knees in her pretty dress before she knows what’s happening. 

 

Wynonna is next to her, Wynonna who gave up Peacemaker, Wynonna who nodded in silent approval when Waverly said  _ I love her _ , Wynonna who’s pulling at Nicole’s jacket because there’s no blood, there’s no blood, there’s no blood. 

 

The bullet hits the floor with a soft sound like the one that leaves Waverly’s chest because she’s ok. She’s wearing a vest. 

 

She’s  _ ok _ . 

 

Waverly leaves her heart on the floor of the station with Nicole, and it almost cripples her because she loves Nicole, she loves her. 

 

She  _ loves _ her. 

 

It’s so obvious now, in the light of an almost death. 

 

But they don’t have time for that now, they don’t have time. All that matters is that Nicole is ok and she’ll see another sunrise and one day soon they’ll see a sunset together, too. 

 

Nicole’s ok, Waverly knows she is, but the shot echos in her throat like a declaration, the end of a parlay, and she and Wynonna go to war. 

  
  


-

  
  


Bobo is a psychopath and a lunatic and a hundred other horrible curses, but he’s not a liar. 

 

“Oh, Waverly. You’re not even an Earp.”

 

Not an Earp. Bobo thinks she’s not an Earp. 

 

And part of her wants to crush the thought at once, because she’s an Earp. She’s an  _ Earp _ . Of course she is, what else would she be. But another deeper part of her can feel the prickle of fear as the voice in her head says,  _ but what if you’re not _ . 

 

She doesn’t have time to think about it, though, because she can hear Willa’s voice. Willa the traitor and Willa the liar and Willa the attempted thief, and Bobo tells her to hide, so she does. 

 

Willa comes and they leave, but Waverly’s still there, crouched behind a ratty old bed, paralysed with fear and anger and  _ betrayal _ . 

 

“Oh, Waverly. You’re not even an Earp.”

  
  


-

  
  


She doesn’t see the shot, she’s too far away for that, but she  _ feels _ it. 

 

Because it’s still, and sound travels in this part of the world, and the gunshot echoes through the empty space between the tree house and the archway, irrespective of the actual distance. 

 

She doesn’t know how, but she knows that shot came from Peacemaker, and she knows Wynonna was behind it and not in front.

 

But she knows that Willa was. 

 

That she’s gone. 

 

For good. 

  
  


-

  
  


The days that follow are quiet. 

 

Wynonna doesn’t stop moving, as much as Waverly tries to slow her down. 

 

She won’t tell Waverly much, she won’t burden her with details. Because she’s already lost one sister,  _ killed _ one sister, and she won’t drive the other away, too. 

 

Waverly doesn’t tell her, she doesn’t repeat what Bobo told her in the treehouse, because she doesn’t think Wynonna can take it, news that she might have lost another sister she never  _ really _ had. 

 

That she’s alone in this curse. 

 

Because as much as she’s brave and she puffs her chest, Waverly knows the toll the weight on Wynonna’s shoulders has, and she will not add to that now. 

 

She goes to Nicole as soon as she can leave Wynonna, because Wynonna will need her, but she doesn’t now. For now she needs to be busy, and she needs to not process anything, and for now, Waverly needs to let her.

 

And that’s ok because Wynonna might not need her now, but Nicole does. 

  
  


-

  
  


She has this whole speech planned.

 

She wants to tell Nicole how glad she is that she’s ok and how much she means to her, but she gets out of the car and picks up the spare key in the place Nicole had told her it was hidden, and the metal in her hand is cool and all of a sudden Waverly is crippled.

 

She’s struck across the cheek by the nightmare that Nicole could have been this cold, and that Willa  _ is, _ and as soon as Nicole wakes and can bear the weight of Waverly’s weight on her shoulder and Waverly’s burden on her heart, she breaks. 

 

And cries. 

  
  


-

  
  


Eventually the fever of grief breaks and Waverly starts to calm properly with Nicole’s arm wrapped carefully around her shoulders. 

 

Her heartbeat is soft and warm and strong against Waverly’s back, and that only serves to further soothe her as she leans half over Nicole, part of their torsos married together and her legs drawn up at the knees with Nicole’s cheek gentle on the top of her head. 

 

The radio is playing in the background at a low volume,  _ I don’t like the silence when I’m alone _ admitted with a shy shrug when Waverly had smiled at its hum, and it’s so peaceful that if Waverly closes her eyes and tries to numb her heart she could almost forget she’s just lost a sister. 

 

Almost. 

 

It’s really the first time they’ve had time to be quiet like this, every moment since their first kiss clouded by haste and panic and urgency and it’s easy for Waverly to dream there in the darkness.

 

It’s easy for her to imagine spending the rest of her life in Nicole’s arms. 

 

“I can’t believe this is the first time I’ve come here,” Waverly says quietly when she can trust her voice, taking Nicole’s hand up out of her lap and threading their fingers together. “It feels like I’ve been here a thousand times even though I don’t even know where your bedroom is.”

 

“The bedroom, huh?” Nicole asks with a smile as she moves her head off of Waverly’s, turning her body just a fraction so she can catch Waverly’s eye. “That’s where your mind goes first?”

 

“Duh,” Waverly says a little cheekily, and her smile is wry to begin with, but it shifts wider, truer, when Nicole’s cheeks redden.  

 

“I can definitely show you that,” Nicole replies with a grin as she takes the lead from Waverly’s open hands. “Although I don’t know how good I’ll be for another few days  _ in _ there.”

 

“Poor baby,” Waverly hums in sympathy at Nicole’s palm. She turns in Nicole’s arms and runs her hands over but not touching Nicole’s side above the bruise splayed out over her ribs, and Nicole grows warmer at the endearment. “I promise to behave myself.”

 

“Oh, I didn’t say you needed to do  _ that _ ,” Nicole says with a smirk as she bites her lip and looks down at Waverly like she’s edible. 

 

“Maybe you should give me a tour then, huh?” Waverly asks, her own cheeks warm now. And she knows Nicole doesn’t have the strength to carry the full length of Waverly’s insinuation through yet, but that doesn’t mean they can’t lose themselves a little in the meantime. 

 

Because Nicole could have  _ died, _ but she didn’t **,** and Waverly wants to celebrate that with moans and gasps and skin and t o u c h.

 

“I do need to show you around,” Nicole says as she tilts Waverly’s head up with her index finger so she can see properly into Waverly’s heart. “Soon, but I want to make sure….are you ok, Wave? I mean you’re  _ not _ , obviously, but are you as ok as you can be? Do you need anything? Can I do anything? Because I’ll do everything, if…..”

 

“I just need you,” Waverly says softly as her hand closes around Nicole’s before she beckons Nicole down and they  _ kiss _ . 

 

It’s different from before, it’s less desperate with Waverly’s grief softened at the edges and more her, more  _ them _ . She loses herself in it for a moment as Nicole’s hands slide along her jaw and into her hair, and she sighs in the relief Nicole’s body brings. 

 

Nicole draws back, her hand gentle at the base of Waverly’s neck and her eyes soft. 

 

“Just me?” Nicole asks again. 

 

“Just you,” Waverly says with a shy smile as her hand finds Nicole’s where it’s still wrapped across her shoulders. “You’re kind of everything.”

 

“You’re kind of everything, too, Wave,” Nicole replies, smiling, and Waverly can’t help but beam because the conviction in Nicole’s voice makes the world shine a little less dull. 

 

She leans in to kiss Waverly again, gentler this time, but  _ deep _ . Her tongue slides into Waverly’s mouth and they groan together before they separate, foreheads touching and hands joined. 

 

Waverly drops her head and something glitters, catching her eye and she lifts her wrist up between them. 

 

“Oh,” Waverly says as her brain registers what’s throwing the light. “I’ve still got your bracelet on. I didn’t even realise. It just feels like it’s always been there.”

 

She goes to slide it off her wrist, but Nicole’s gentle hand on her own halts the movement. 

 

“No, I want you to keep it,” Nicole says softly. “If you want, that is?”

 

“You’re sure?” Waverly asks as her fingers slide over the warm metal, smiling quietly. 

 

“Positive,” Nicole says with a wider smile. “I kinda like the idea of you having something of mine to wear? Actually, there’s something else I wanted to give you, too.”

 

She shifts slowly off the couch, her hand not leaving Waverly’s until it absolutely has to, to rustle through her jacket pocket before she pulls out something that fits in her palm, temporarily concealed from Waverly’s view. 

 

She looks shy, shier than Waverly’s seen her in a really, really long time as she takes her seat next to Waverly again, and Waverly has no idea what could possibly be making Nicole so until she turns her hand over to reveal a small silver key. 

 

“I know you know where the spare is, but I wanted you to have your own?” Nicole says quietly. “And I know we’ve been together like a week, but god, Wave, it feels like it’s been my whole damn life already, in the best way. I can’t wait for it to be my whole damn life, if you’ll have me.”

 

“You cut me a key to your place?” Waverly asks, and everything clouding her mind, everything heavy across her back from the last few days  _ recedes _ in the light of Nicole’s hesitant smile. 

 

“Do you think it’s silly? Is it too soon? God it is, isn’t it?” Nicole says a little flustered as she tries to close her hand, but Waverly reaches for it and covers Nicole’s palm with her own. 

 

“Nicole,” Waverly says quietly and Nicole stills immediately, so beautifully responsive to the sound of Waverly’s voice. The key warms between their hands and Waverly’s heart follows. “I love it. I  _ love _ it. And I’ll gladly take it if you still want me to have it.”

 

“I really do,” Nicole says with a smile, and her hand squeezes where they are joined. “I really, really do, Wave.”

 

“You’re sure?” Waverly says, and she can feel her throat thicken because no one's ever done anything like this before. 

 

She didn’t even have a key to Champ’s place and they dated for years, and yet here Nicole is laying her heart on a platter for Waverly from the very beginning. 

 

“I had it cut days ago and I’ve been going back and forth because I want this to be a place you can come to, I want this to be your home as well, but I was worried you’d think it was too fast. I was worried I might have scared you off if I gave it to you now, but then all this happened and…I don’t know it, put things into perspective,” Nicole says with a shy shrug as she waits for Waverly’s response. 

 

Waverly can tell how nervous she is because her hands are trembling slightly in Waverly’s own, and the show of sincerity is so endearing that she almost descends into tears. 

 

“I feel the same, you know,” Waverly says as she soothes her voice over Nicole’s hesitation. “I know this is still so new and we haven’t even…. I mean….but I just feel like I want to give you  _ everything _ regardless because….”

 

She trails off and she’s not sure how to articulate herself, but she looks to Nicole and Nicole beams like she does. 

 

“Because this is it?” Nicole offers quietly. 

 

“Yeah,” Waverly says, softening because Nicole  _ understands _ . “This is it.”

 

“I’d get you a key for the homestead but I don’t even know if the front door has a lock,” Waverly says with a laugh. “But the sentiment’s the same, for you I mean. I’d get a key that doesn’t actually work if you wanted….”

 

“Thank you, Wave,” Nicole says softly, and she looks close to tears herself, and Waverly’s brow furrows a little.

 

“What for?” Waverly asks, a curious furrow to her brow as she looks to Nicole. 

 

“For letting me in,” Nicole replies gently, and in a second, Waverly understands that Nicole has lived a life on the periphery, too, just like Waverly has. Not out of choice, or rather not of their  _ own  _ choice, but because other people have put them there. 

 

Other people have ostracised them. 

 

In an instant, Waverly understands that this means the same for Nicole as it does for Waverly, to have another person open up and trust and hold nothing back. To accept her, to ask nothing of her beyond what she is willing to give herself, and then not even that much if Waverly doesn’t want to give it. 

 

But she does, god how she does. 

 

“Thank you for letting me in, too,” Waverly says, her face warm as Nicole deposits the key firmly in her hand. “And for the key, and for the bracelet, and for….”

 

Nicole leans forward and kisses her before Waverly has the chance to say  _ I wish I had something to give you back,  _ because she already has, and this is Nicole’s way of showing her that. 

 

It begins slow, with the speed of a slowly rising dawn. They angle towards one another and it’s chaste and gentle, but then Waverly’s heart beats and she nips at Nicole’s lower lip, teasing. 

 

Nicole holds back for a second before she draws away for a breath and  _ leans in.  _

 

Her lips find Waverly’s like they’re magnetised, and her hands settle around Waverly’s waist and pull Waverly into her lap before they slide down to her ass, palming firmly and pulling her flush against Nicole’s body, and they both sigh heavy at the union. 

 

Waverly moves back with a gasp to suck in a quick breath and then she moves in. She descends on Nicole’s mouth with a hungry tongue and burning lips, and her hands slide into Nicole’s hair, loose around her shoulders, before they curl and pull slightly and Nicole groans. 

 

_ I’m learning _ , Waverly thinks to herself with a smile at Nicole’s response. Because she might not have a lick of experience at other things, but that’s ok because she’s  _ learning _ .

 

She knows how Nicole likes to be kissed now, where she likes to be touched when they do, how, and she grins against Nicole’s mouth when the redhead breaks away with a pant because she knows things now. She knows. 

 

“Goddamn rib,” Nicole mutters under her breath as she frowns,  and Waverly can’t help but agree because it’s the only thing holding them back now, her body at Nicole’s hands, ready. 

 

“Goddamn rib, indeed,” Waverly says, smiling as she slides her arms around Nicole’s shoulders and shuffles her position over Nicole’s lap.

 

Nicole bites her lip in response, her hands sliding up Waverly’s back, and she’s looking at Waverly like she’s starving and Waverly’s the first meal she’s seen in days. 

 

But as much as Waverly wants to give in and finally feel Nicole touch her,  _ have _ her, she won’t do it at the expense of Nicole being in pain, no matter how loud her own hunger is. 

 

“Hey,” Waverly says soothingly, an attempt to break Nicole out of her trance as her hands move down Nicole’s arms. “Why don’t you give me that tour, huh?” 

 

“Sure,” Nicole replies with a wry smile, like she knows exactly what Waverly’s trying to do. “Actually, there are a couple of other things I wanted to show you, too.”

 

Waverly climbs off Nicole’s lap delicately and she watches as Nicole’s eyes follow the movement like she wants to change her mind and fix her hands to Waverly’s hips and  _ hold _ , but she doesn’t. She just bites her lip instead and smiles when Waverly offers her a hand. 

 

“Lead the way,” Waverly says as she threads their fingers together, holding Nicole close to her side. 

 

She’s slower than usual, the strain in her rib cage making her movements more careful, but Waverly doesn’t mind. She just moves a little closer so Nicole can lean on her. 

 

“Well this is the kitchen and living room, obviously,” Nicole says, gesturing around as they walk to the door of the stairs. “And my room and the spare are upstairs, and the bathroom.”

 

“You don’t have to take me up if it hurts too much,” Waverly offers as she halts Nicole with a hand on her arm as she takes a step onto the first stair. 

 

“I’m ok,” Nicole says smiling softly at Waverly. “I mean, we don’t have to go up if you don’t want….”

 

“I do,” Waverly replies quickly. “I mean, I’d like to see it all.”

 

Nicole smiles at the accidental double entendre in Waverly’s words, and Waverly blushes hopelessly before Nicole turns and takes another step, leading them both up. 

 

They’re quiet as they walk, Waverly lost in her own head for a moment because it’s special, being here with Nicole, it feels  _ meaningful _ . 

 

The house isn’t sparse, but it’s certainly not cluttered, and yet Nicole’s presence hangs in the house. It’s warm and comforting, and Waverly doesn’t think she’s ever felt as at home as she does here, now, with Nicole’s hand in her own. 

 

She leads Waverly to a doorway into a bedroom that is obviously Nicole’s own, and Waverly smiles wide before she turns to Nicole. 

 

“It’s lovely,” Waverly breathes as she drops Nicole’s hand to walk into the room. Nicole hangs back at the door, like she wants to capture the vision of Waverly in her space for the first time and sear it soft into her memory. 

 

The furniture is vaguely Scandinavian, simple but beautiful, and her bed is covered in soft white linen, immaculately made, with an armoire on the other side of the room. 

 

Waverly walks for it, curious to see the small things Nicole keeps on the top. She looks back to Nicole for a nod of ok before she does. 

 

There isn’t a lot, a few rings and a small thin necklace and her badge alongside a bottle of the perfume she wears. She picks it up, uncapping it and breathing in the soft scene of Nicole before she notices the space on one side of the dresser. 

 

She turns, looking for Nicole with a question in her eye, finding her only an arm's reach away. Waverly holds out her hand, and Nicole moves into her side with a sigh. 

 

“What….?” Waverly asks, not sure how to ask in case it’s not what she thinks it is. 

 

“That’s what I wanted to show you,” Nicole says with a smile. “And the bedside table.”

 

She gestures to one side of the bed, the small table cleared save a short jug with a few wildflowers that look freshly picked. 

 

“There’s some room in the closet, too, for your clothes I mean. It’s nothing big, I just wanted to make a little space for you,” Nicole says shyly. “You know, in case you wanted to keep a few things here, if you ever want to stay over. I know you haven’t yet, and I’m not assuming anything, but….I wanted this to feel like your place, too, Wave. When you’re ready for it.”

 

She’s speechless, floored, nothing to command from her lungs because the breath is gone. 

 

She turns to Nicole with a thickness in her throat before she takes a step towards the dresser, running her fingers softly along the pale wood, and when she turns back to Nicole, she’s crying. 

 

“Oh, baby,” Nicole says pulling Waverly to her, the soft endearment falling from her lips easily. “I didn’t mean to make you upset, I just….”

 

“They’re happy tears,” Waverly says as she shakes her head and smiles through them. “Happy tears, Nicole.”

 

“They are?” Nicole asks, worried. “You’re sure? Because it’s ok if you’re overwhelmed, Wave. I can back off, I can leave you to….”

 

“No,” Waverly says quickly as she moves for both of Nicole’s hands. “Don’t go anywhere, please.”

 

“Never,” Nicole returns with a gentle smile at Waverly’s touch. “Never, unless you ask me.”

 

She untangles one hand and reaches for Waverly’s cheek, lifting a tear off with her thumb gently, and Waverly sighs at the feeling of Nicole’s touch on her skin.  

 

“I’m sorry,” Nicole says sincerely. “I feel terrible for making you cry.”

 

“Don’t be,” Waverly replies as she draws Nicole over to the bedside table. “It’s so touching Nicole.  _ So _ touching. More than I could ever say.”

 

“It’s only a bit of space,” Nicole says shrugging, a soft smile on her lips. 

 

“But no one's ever made space for me before,” Waverly breathes with a sad smile as she reaches for the flowers, the petals soft beneath her fingertips. “I wish I could tell you how much it means that you do.”

 

“I know things might have been a certain way for you in the past, Wave,” Nicole says carefully,  _ with him _ unsaid between them. “But it’s not going to be like that with me.”

 

“I know,” Waverly returns with a smile as she looks to the book and glass of water on Nicole’s side of the bed. 

 

“And you don’t need to worry about saying things sometimes, because you might not feel like you have the words, but you tell me in other ways,” Nicole says gently. “Your body does. I know how much this means, ok. I know. Because it means that much to me, too.”

 

“I haven’t done anything,” Waverly offers with a watery smile. 

 

“You have though, Wave,” Nicole says, her own gaze soft with tears now, too. “You’ve done so much. You’ve let me in, and you’ve given me your time, and your friendship, and now this, too. You’ve given me a place. You’ve given me a reason to stay.”

 

“I have?” Waverly asks with a soft breath. 

 

“Yeah,” Nicole says, a gentle laugh escaping her lips. “You have, Wave. You  _ really _ have. And I don’t mean that to put pressure on you, that’s the last thing I want. I just mean that you’ve done more than you could ever think just by being you. And by accepting me for me.”

 

She sighs as she finishes, and Waverly can  _ see _ , she can see just how much Nicole means it. Her heart swells and swoops, and all of a sudden she’s overwhelmed with the urge to do something, because standing here, holding hands, it’s incredible, but it’s not enough. 

 

Waverly raises their hands to her mouth and kisses over each of Nicole’s knuckles, and Nicole’s right, sometimes she doesn’t have the words, but that doesn’t mean she can’t talk in different ways. 

 

She takes a step backwards, pulling Nicole towards the bed. She knows they can’t do everything, but they can touch still, not  _ touch,  _ but touch a little more than they are now. Like they had in the car and downstairs on the couch, to ease the ache in her hands. 

 

Or make it worse, but what sweet torture that would be. 

 

“What are you doing?” Nicole asks carefully as she watches Waverly take a seat on the foot of the bed, holding her hand out for Nicole to take and join her. 

 

“Showing you,” Waverly replies with a smile as Nicole takes her place by Waverly’s side. She turns her body into Nicole’s, her eyes dropping to Nicole’s lips before she moves, chasing Nicole’s mouth with her own. 

 

Only it’s not a chase if Nicole meets her, if she  _ moves, _ too. 

 

And she does. 

 

Her hands find Waverly’s cheeks, and her palms are gentle as the kiss begins, and that’s what it feels like deeper, too. 

 

A beginning. 

 

Nicole’s hands are soft, but her lips are softer, and Waverly holds the kiss like that for as long as she can before her body demands more and she turns the dial to scorching. 

 

She slants her mouth and pushes with her tongue and surges against Nicole. The redhead’s hands move to catch her body immediately, one on Waverly’s neck as the other slides around Waverly’s ribs just under her breast, and Waverly’s breath hitches. 

 

She pulls back with a gasp to look at Nicole, her hands heavy with desire, and Nicole’s eyes are wide and dark and Waverly can feel her heartbeat through her hands where they rest on her body. 

 

“I know we can’t….I mean, I know we have to wait, but it doesn’t mean we can’t still do this for a while, right?” Waverly asks a little coy as she traces the line of Nicole’s jaw. “I just want to be near you. I want to be with you. If you want me?”

 

“Of course I do,” Nicole says and her eyes are  _ bright _ . “And you’re right, I want to wait so I can do  _ everything  _ and this damn rib isn’t in the way, but I can still kiss.”

 

She leans in as if to demonstrate, collecting Waverly’s chin as she tips Waverly’s head back and kisses her for all they’re both worth. Her hands sink into Waverly’s hair beneath her loose ponytail and drag against her scalp, and Waverly groans against her mouth in reply. 

 

“You can  _ definitely _ still kiss,” Waverly growls against Nicole’s lips and she’s about two seconds away from climbing back into Nicole’s lap. 

 

She stays put until Nicole’s tongue sweeps out over her bottom lip as Waverly watches, and at that her self-restraint  _ snaps _ . 

 

She slides her knees on either side or Nicole’s and Nicole’s hands find her waist and she pulls Waverly close again and Waverly mewls at the warmth against her thighs. 

 

“Are you sure you’re ok to do this?” Waverly asks as her forefinger graces the line of Nicole’s lip and her tongue chases Waverly’s finger. “It won’t be….I mean it’s not too much of a tease to know we can’t actually….?”

 

Nicole smiles before she catches Waverly’s finger between her teeth gently, sucking firmly. Waverly’s stomach drops before she lets it go, only capable of left staring back a little dumbly as Nicole smirks at her. 

 

“Don’t get me wrong,” Nicole says, her voice firm and assertive and gravelly as hell. “It’s torturous, but I think it would be worse if you left. If I couldn’t do  _ this _ .” 

 

She palms Waverly’s ass, pulling them properly flush and bringing Waverly’s breasts against her own. There’s a thrill that jolts through her blood at the contact before Nicole moves her lips against Waverly’s again, her tongue firm and insistent like her hands, and Waverly just melts beneath her. 

 

“But if you think it’s too hard, or you want to go,” Nicole says and her whole body softens as she offers Waverly her choice. “That’s fine, too.”

 

“I don’t want to leave,” Waverly says with a smirk and she rolls her hips against Nicole’s earning her a beautiful moan. “I really don’t want to leave.”

 

“It’s getting late, though,” Nicole asks a little concerned as her hands smooth over Waverly’s sides down to her hips. “Are you ok to….”

 

“I have a bag, in the Jeep,” Waverly replies sheepishly. “I didn’t want to assume you’d want the company, and it doesn’t mean… I just thought you might want me to stay.”

 

“I do,” Nicole says as her face breaks in a grin set to rival the sun. “I really do, Wave. Stay, please.”

 

“Yeah?” Waverly asks, and the words are simple and quiet, but the meaning in them runs deep.

 

It runs deep and it flows and the possibility blooms in Waverly’s heart of those two words, I do, in another time, in another place, in a white dress with lace around her wrists and Nicole’s ring warm on her finger, and the promise of life, together, sealed between them. 

 

“Yeah, baby,” Nicole answers gently as her hands move down over Waverly’s thighs. 

 

It grounds them, connecting them, and Waverly doesn’t know how such a thing is possible, but she feels like Nicole can see the same thing too, that dream, reflected in Waverly’s eyes as she speaks. “Stay.”

 

So she does. 

  
  


-

  
  


**end** . 

part one. 

  
  


-

**Author's Note:**

> Phew, are you alive? I really hope so, because we've got season two to go yet.
> 
> I'd love to hear if you enjoyed this, these undertakings have been huge but I swear they feel like they've become a part of me so I really hope this and the season two piece make for a good read!
> 
> I'll endeavour to have season two up in a week-ish, but until then I'm on [tumblr](http://tigerlo.tumblr.com) if you want to come and check out some of the little ficlets I've done recently, or want to say hi <3
> 
> Thanks so much for reading, see you all soon!
> 
> x


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